Sunday, July 19, 2009

my favorite new name

I have been a mom for a little over three months and it has been such a life changing experience. I was reflecting today on what the Lord has done in the lives of our children since we first met them and I couldn't help but praise God for how powerfully he has revealed his love to me though my little girl and little boy.

Anyone who has met Mya, our four year old, becomes instantly aware that she has a strong and wonderful personality. She loves being the center of attention, loves making people laugh, and loves saying things that you would hear out of the mouth of a teenager.

After living with us every weekend for three months, Mya and Niko moved in full time at the beginning of April. We told them when we first began taking care of them on the weekends, that we were going to become their new mommy and daddy, but we never told them what to call us. Since we had such a long/strange "in-transition" stage where we weren't their parents, but were trying to be...we figured they were confused and when the dust settled, would instinctively know what to call us.

Niko and Mya instantly called Vermon "daddy." It was so precious to hear and I loved seeing Vermon's big smile every time they heard it...it didn't go so quickly with me. I figured, with their history, it would take longer to start calling me "mom," but knew it would happen. Even though I was slightly jealous of Vermon, I figured, even mother of infants don't get to hear themselves called mom for almost a year--and even then, for some reason, "da da" is among babies first words.

The journey of becoming "Mommy" went something like this...

Mya would be having a tantrum and I would be disciplining her, explaining her sin and hard heart and her need for Jesus. "You'll NNNNNEEEEEEVVVVVEEEERRR be my mommy!" She would scream at the top of her lungs.

Later in the day, Vermon would home, "Daddy!" and then she'd look over at me and stick her hand on her hip and say, "he's my daddy! You're not my mommy!"

Other times we would be playing dolls or with stuffed animals and she would "make-believe" I was her mommy...and giggle or laugh every time she called me it, but made sure to tell me it was just a game. She wanted to test it out, but wasn't ready to commit.

"Dennae" she would say, "yes, daughter" "You can be my mommy yesterday (she mixes up yesterday and tomorrow)" I would gently explain that I already am her mommy, just like God wants to be our father, whether we realize it or not.

Our entire first month and a half was like this. I knew Mya desperately wanted a mommy, she longed to call me mommy and longed to belong to me. She would desperately want me to hold her, but would resist asking me with every bone in her body. I could see the turmoil within her.

Then, on Mother's Day, Mya started calling me "Mommy" and instantly began acting like I was her mommy. The transformation in her heart was beautiful. Vermon and I often say, that she has become more beautiful in the last few months...as she realizes this is forever, as she realizes she belongs to someone, as she learns her new identity as a "Pierre", she smiles more and more.

Now...only two months later, I can't even go into the bathroom without Mya wanting to follow me in. Several times a day, Mya runs up to me, kisses me, and says, "You're the best Mommy in the WHOLE world." When she's in time out, now she argues, "But Mommy, I need you to be with me. But Mommy, I won't be able to see you!"

I love hearing Niko and Mya call me "mommy". I can't hear it enough. I never thought I would like the sound so much. It has been such a lesson in how I pray to the Lord. How overjoyed God must be to hear his little children call him "Abba (daddy)" Father.

1 comment:

Karlene said...

We have so much to appreciate in our relationship with our Father. So many connections in our earthly family teach us still to help us understand. We have so much more to learn but God is faithful to reveal Himself to us!! Yeah!!!