Exploring Love

Changing up the Blog...

2010-10-18T13:02:00.000-07:00

I will not be posting on this blog anymore. I will be posting consistently about adoption on my adoption blog:

thankful4adoption.blogspot.com

and all other musings, rantings, or thoughts will go on the Roosevelt church blog (along with Vocab, Vermon, and a few other people's great thoughts):

runhardrunwell.blogspot.com

I'm a little sentimental about giving up this blog :( but I think this will help me focus my writing more. For those of you who have been following this blog, please follow the adoption blog!

Blessings,

Dennae

Understanding YOUR adoption shapes your child’s understanding of THEIR adoption, part 3

2010-10-15T00:15:00.000-07:00

All Things New

Last week we talked about where you came from and who you were before your adoption in Christ. It was not a pretty picture. Now let's look at who you are in your new adopted family. Please take some time to read these passages in the context they were written in.

1. Because of adoption, you were given a new life

Ezekiel 11: 19-20: “And I will give them one heart, and a new spirit I will put within them. I will remove the heart of stone from their flesh and give them a heart of flesh, that they may walk in my statutes and keep my rules and obey them. And they shall be my people, and I will be their God”

Ephesians 2: “And you WERE dead…BUT GOD…made us alive together in Christ…”

You were dead, but God made you alive. He gave you a new life at great personal cost to himself. Because of Christ’s death and resurrection, you are no longer a child of the enemy. You are now a child of God. You are no longer enslaved to death. You are now alive. When you hear the word “adoption” your first thought should be: life.

2.
2. Because of adoption, you were given a new identity

Galatians 4: “…you WERE enslaved to the elementary principles of the world.” but we were redeemed “…so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his son into our hearts crying, “Abba! Father! So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.”

There are many other places in the NT that talk about how we are “no longer” slaves (Hebrews 2, Romans 6 & 8, Galatians 5) instead we are seen as sons and daughters of God! We were dirty, worthless, and had nothing to offer. We were not desirable. Yet God adopted us and because of our adoption we now share in the inheritance of Christ! We are clothed in righteousness instead of sin. We are beloved children instead of rebellious enemies. Our identity is now: Christ.

3. 3. Because of adoption, you were given a new purpose

Read 2 Corinthians 5: 16-21. The most quoted/known part of this passage is verse 17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation the old has passed away; behold the new has come.” Take some time to read the context of this passage. We are told that because we are a new creation we are now given the ministry of reconciliation. How beautiful! We are adopted into a family that has a purpose, a reason for existing. We were not just pardoned for our sin, but we were assigned the same purpose that God himself has for creation! We get to participate in his plan to redeem people to himself from every tribe, tongue, and nation. This is only because of adoption. We could have been justified and sanctified without then being adopted by God, but because of adoption, we now share in Christ’s inheritance and purpose. Because we are sons and daughters of God we are duty bound to fulfill the ministry we have been called to.

How should our understanding of these truths influence the way we speak and think about us adopting children?

There are dozens of parallels, but a few stand out to me:

1. You got a new name, so should they. Despite what the world and psychologist may say, there is nothing wrong with it and name changing is a biblical concept. You have a new name because you are now a new creation, so do not feel guilty about renaming your child. There is something significant and meaningful about picking your child’s name. Since the beginning of time (Adam, Abraham,Isaac,

Israel

, etc) being assigned a name was important. You do not HAVE to give a new first name (We didn’t with Mya, but did with Marcel), but then at least assign a very meaningful middle name. It is a powerful way to relate to your child since you both have new identities and new names, all because you were both adopted. Marcel Vermon Pierre. Mya Hope Pierre.

Judah

Justice Pierre. I love to talk with Marcel and Mya (and someday

Judah

) about why we picked those names and how excited I am to also have a new name because of what Christ did for me!

2. You should never fear that you are not equipped to help your child work through whatever comes up as a result of their past. IF you understand who you were before Christ and who you are now that God has adopted you into his family THROUGH Christ, then EVERYTHING your child goes through you can personally relate to. Every time Marcel speaks to me about his hurt or pain, his eyes light up when I share a story that mirrors his—only I speak of it through a spiritual lens. Your child was abused physically by a biological parent? You were abused spiritually by the devil. Your child was treated like dirt? You were a slave to dirt. Your child has uncommon fear? You were owned by fear. Your child worries about being unlovable. You were unlovable.
My children have yet to share something with me that I could not relate to. Empathizing with their pain has been healing for my children and has knit us into a family. Our conversations always end with Marcel saying how thankful he is for having such a good God who loves him.

3.         Too often I hear of women, unable to have children, desperate to be a mother, longing to begin the adoption process, yet their husbands refuse to adopt. These men claim to be Christian, yet are unable to see a child they adopt as their own child. Mother’s Day comes and goes each year and they allow their wives to remain barren, while God has given them a beautiful means to bear children through adoption.
    Of course there is still great pain, loss, and heartache to work through when women cannot conceive, but that pain is different then the pain of being childless for life. That is a pain that is much deeper and greater. A pain no woman should have to go through for life against her will. It also does not compare to the pain of children being parentless. Also a pain that no child should have to face, but many do because too many Christians do not adopt.
    A husband who is struggling to joyfully pursue adoption when his wife desperately wants to be a mother should seek councel from a pastor and ask the Holy Spirit to open their eyes to this gospel truth. Their minds need to be transformed and renewed by God’s word in relation to this truth.

I am convinced that Christians do not adopt because they do not understand their adoption biblically. And to not understand the theology of adoption is to miss the heart of the gospel. I pray that our churches would be full of men and women who come before God full of awe and wonder that he would adopt them. I pray that the theology of adoption would so captivate our hearts that we are undone before our Lord and can’t help but look for ways to adopt children or support families who are positioned to adopt. I hope our churches are one day full of families begging for the chance to adopt a child that is in need of a family. This would so beautifully reflect what has already happened in heaven.

Understanding YOUR adoption shapes your child’s understanding of THEIR adoption, part 2

2010-10-06T11:14:00.000-07:00

Whose Your Daddy?

If you are a Christian, then you are adopted by God. Have you ever stopped to think about who your biological father is?

The Devil. Yes, the devil is your birth father. An evil, abusive father whom you were enslaved to.

Check out these verses and look how Scripture talks about the unbeliever:

Acts 14:4-12

1 John 3:1-10

Hebrews 2:14-18

My point here is NOT to compare bio family to Satan. My point is that it is important for YOU to understand who your biological family was. You were born a slave to sin. Your thoughts, actions, and words were full of deceit, selfishness, lust, greed, and pride. When God looked at you, all he saw was a man or woman in total rebellion to him, partnering with Satan gearing up to plot an attack against himself and everything that is good, righteous, and holy.

1 Corinthians 6:11 lists a long list of terrible, wicked things and then says to the believers in the church, “and so were some of you!”

The moment you water down who you were before Christ, if you forget how wicked and unholy you really were, then the gospel begins to slip through your fingers. It is only in understanding how wicked you really were, how deserving of death and destruction you were, that you can begin to worship and praise God for his great grace in your life. If you truly believe that you deserved God’s wrath and judgment for your sin and that there was NOTHING you could do to earn his favor, NOTHING you could do to make yourself right in his eyes, then you can really accept that it is ONLY through Christ the God becoming man, suffering the punishment of our sins, that you are now a child of God.

You are not just forgiven. You are not just pardoned. That would have been gracious of God to stop there. But he didn’t. He then adopted you and made you his child. He became your father, your “Abba.” (Hebrew word for daddy)

SO, how does this relate to how we think and speak of adoption?

IF you understand your adoption by God and who your biological family was, then these words should not come out of your mouth (all of which I have heard too many times from Christian families):

“I have considered adoption, but what if the gene to be abusive/drug addicted/ alcohol addicted is in the baby I adopt? That would be too hard for me.”

“I’m afraid I couldn’t love a child that wasn’t [biologically] mine or a child that doesn’t look like me.”

“My child has all these attachment issues and it isn’t my fault…” (then the person usually goes on to explain all the issues that happened in the first few years of their life) side note: I have never met a child with special needs whose biological parent takes the time to explain biologically why their child has down syndrome, ADHD, and sensory problems.

“God just didn’t give me a heart for adoption.”

“We have no choice but to ship off our teen [who was adopted at birth] to some camp a few states away because they are causing too many problems, but it isn’t how we parented them—its because of their birth family’s issues…” another side note: I know several families who have had to send their biological children to similar places they sometimes take responsibility for what they did or simply say, “I have no idea why they ended up this way” they don’t blame it on something from their past.

“My child is disobedient, disrespectful, etc, because they were adopted. We’re just going to love them through it.”

Let’s pretend for a minute that God spoke the same way about us. Here is what he would say (fill your name in blank):

“_________is disobedient, disrespectful, etc, because they used to be a son of the devil. It’s ok though, I understand and will just ignore it and love him through it.”

Please understand that I am not trying to minimize some issues that your child may have as a result of abuse or trauma. I know it is real. When I was a social worker, I worked with hundreds of children who had very real struggles because of evil things that were done to them. A parent watching their child suffer over past hurts and wounds has real, deep pain. I weep over it as many adoptive parents do.

What I am trying to do is encourage us to stop speaking so negatively about children who are adopted as permanently wounded soldiers and to encourage you to reject false assumptions that a child you adopt will never be the same as a child you birth.

It is not true for us and our biological father was more evil and abusive then anything we could imagine. We were brainwashed, enslaved to the price of darkness…

BUT GOD…

Meditate on Ephesians 2:

"And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

Understanding YOUR adoption shapes your child’s understanding of THEIR adoption, part 1

2010-10-03T21:59:00.000-07:00

Vermon and I are often asked how it is that our children were able to attach so quickly to our family. People also comment on how “lucky” we are that our children do not have any attachment disorders.

It would be dishonest to say that the relationship we have with Marcel and Mya now is the same that it was a year and a half ago. It did take time to attach and there were difficult moments, tears shed, and much prayer; however, all in all, our path of becoming a close family unit has been smooth, full of blessing, and fun.

I do not dismiss the fact that there are children who have attachment disorders, RAD, and issues related to drug exposure that may make the attachment process take longer. I also do not claim to be an expert on parenting or that we have done everything right. I am brought to tears as I think and praise the Lord for his GREAT grace in knitting our family together in the way that he has in such a short period of time. However, I do believe that the single best advice I can give to ANY parent who wants to know how to attach with their child whom they have adopted is to FIRST and FOREMOST understand YOUR adoption. If you do not understand YOUR ADOPTION by God through Christ Jesus then

do not adopt.

Yes, I said it. Do not adopt children unless you have first and foremost begun to think, meditate, study God’s word, and pray about the theology of YOUR ADOPTION by God. Many of the horror stories that the media portrays about adoption (or your friends tell you) come from the adoptive families not fully understanding God’s adoption of his people.

Over the next few posts I would like to explore different aspects of OUR ADOPTION by God and look at how the theology of adoption should then shape our thoughts about our family, our family values, and how we think and speak about our children.

Resources for Teaching Your Kids God's Word

2010-09-18T22:17:00.000-07:00

I love teaching and reading to my kids and my favorite topic to teach them about is the Bible. God's word was such an anchor for me during my childhood and my dad's consistent, faithful teaching of scripture helped to ground me through many difficult seasons.

I want God’s word filling the hearts and minds of Marcel, Mya, and Judah. I know that scripture contains pages and pages of guidance on wise living. I know that they will find deep joy as they learn who God is through understanding what scripture has to say about him. Most importantly, I know that they can travel through 6000 (+ or -) years of human history as they discover God’s great plan to save a people to himself through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

In the last year and a half of having the wonderful privilege of being a mom…we’ve collected some great books and CD’s that our kids beg us to read or listen to (and we find them quite enjoyable too!) Some of them we have read so many times, Mya can finish the sentences or say them verbatim. Often, Marcel is able to tell us what scripture has to say about a particular issue. I feel so blessed to have the money to spend on books and to live in a country and time in history where they are so readily available!

So if I could give every parent a selection from our children’s library…here are my favorite picks:

#1) The Jesus Storybook Bible

Age level: all ages

This is the best children’s Bible out there. Unfortunately, so much of children’s bible stories moralize Christianity and make the hero and point of the story someone other then God (but that is another blog post for another time). Every story in the Jesus Storybook Bible points toward the overall theme of scripture that Jesus is coming to rescue us from ourselves and it is all a part of God’s great plan. The art is wonderful and creative too.

#2) The Jesus Storybook Bible: Audio CD

The man who reads the Jesus Storybook Bible does such a great job and the kids eat it up. They love to draw pictures of Bible stories while listening to him read the stories. It

#2) Big Truths for Little Kids: Teaching Your Children to Live For God

Age level: preschool-5th grade

We do this with our devotions every morning while eating breakfast. It often leads to great conversations as we drive to school. The book rewords a traditional catechism into kid-language and each story teaches the children about 5 or 6 of the 104 questions. The kids are motivated to memorize all the questions and answers because we don’t read the next story until they have memorized the other questions.

#3) Genesis: A Commentary for Children

Age level: 3rd grade-adult

Marcel and I are currently studying Genesis together and this commentary is a wonderful resource! The author knows how to write for children. Her words are beautiful, descriptive, and biblically accurate. It has been a fun way to introduce tools (like commentaries) for Bible study to Marcel. There are also commentaries for Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy—but we have not gotten to those yet.

#4) Seeds Family Worship Audio CDs

Age level: preschool-3rd grade

These songs get stuck in my head and the tunes aren’t the hippest, but the words are strait up scripture and what better repetitive children’s music to have stuck in your head then scripture? Our children really enjoy them and it has been fun to talk with them about the scripture they are memorizing means.

#5) The ESV Illustrated Family Bible

Age level: 3rd grade reading level

When Marcel first began to excel in reading this Bible was a great way to get him in the habit of having daily quiet times with the Lord. It picks 270 important passages of scripture and adds some great illustrations. Marcel read through it about 3 times and spent just as much time reading the passages of scripture as he did staring at the details of the drawings. We felt it was important to introduce him to an adult version of the Bible and get him used to the vocabulary that he would not see in a children’s Bible. He often had to stop to ask me to explain different words he was reading, but never had a hard time understanding the basic storyline. He has recently decided to “move on” to a full adult Bible for his quiet times, but I think this was an important transition to understand that what we are reading in children’s Bibles are versions of the Bible stories…but not the actual words of the Bible themselves.

"Marks of the Messanger: Knowing, Living, and Speaking the Gospel" by J. Mack Stiles

2010-06-25T22:13:00.001-07:00

This book brought me to tears and gave me a chilling awareness of how little I share the gospel. It brought me to my knees in repentance. It was not a guilt tripping evangelism book that left me feeling like I need to "try harder" or "do better". Rather, the author paints such a glorious picture of the gospel and our high calling to be apart of gospel work, that I finished each chapter with an urgency to know and live the gospel in a fuller and more vibrant way.

Read this book several times and find a friend to read and discuss it with!

Scandalous: The Cross and Resurrection of Jesus by D A Carson

2010-06-25T22:05:00.000-07:00

Scandalous consists of 5 chapters in which Carson goes through a different passage of scriptures and digs through them, pulling out deep truths about Christ, the cross, our battle against Satan's rage, and the resurrection. Each chapter is full of rich biblical and theological thought that kept my mind racing as I attempted to digest it.

Not only is the book a wonderful read because of the topic, but if you pay attention, the chapters are also a tutorial on how to read your Bible. Carson is one of those voices that I like my mind and heart to have a steady diet of because I grow in understanding how to read scripture. Paying attention to how Carson exegetes scripture will teach you how to read your Bible and put it together. I highly recommend any of his writings (or sermons) and if you are new to Carson, this is a great book to start with.

Why Can't We Just Read the Bible- An Interview with D A Carson

2010-06-25T21:00:00.000-07:00

Check out this great interview with Carson! Carson does a great job of explaining our need to understand theology and God's word.

However, I am hesitant to post this article because I disagree with what he says about not being able to read when you have young children (I never thought I would disagree with Carson!). It is true that being a mother of 3 will zap you, but I think it is only through reading large amounts of Scripture (and growing in our understanding of biblical theology through other reading) that you can survive it and have the fruit of the Spirit necessary to teach your children about Jesus and love them like Jesus.

I guess that is where mothers need to rely on their husbands and Christian community for help so that they can find the time to read. If we really take seriously our call of mothering--then there is no other time quite like now, while our children are young, that we need our sword sharp, ready to battle. We can't just "survive" our children, but we must be spiritually fit as we lead them into the battle that is waging against their soul. One of the greatest ways to be fit is through regular, consistent reading of the word.

So moms, please read this as an encouragement to further and deepen your knowledge and love of scripture. And ignore the few sentences that might tempt you to excuse this season as an "off" season...and if you want to drop your kids off at my house so you can go read for a few hours at the sbux across the street...just holla. :)

4 things that happened in the courtroom that gave me chills

2010-05-12T16:56:00.000-07:00

1. The judge explaining that the children were no longer wards of the state, but now belonged to us. I was reminded that I was once a ward of this world and a slave to sin, but now I belong to Christ. (Gal. 3:29)

2. The judge explained that the children’s names would no longer be _____ and ____, but were now Mya Hope Pierre and Marcel Vermon Pierre. I was reminded that when I became God's child all the old things passed away and I was made new! (2 Corinthians 5:17)

3. Having a room full of family to celebrate the adoption! It reminded me that upon becoming part of God’s family I was welcomed by countless brothers and sisters from every tribe, tongue, and language who will spend eternity as my brothers and sisters worshiping God forever. (Revelation 7:9-12)

4. The relief that for the rest of my life, I will be Marcel and Mya’s mommy. Nothing can change that. I will never relinquish my legal right as their mother. And I will never relinquish my love for them. This made me think that there is nothing that can separate me from God’s great love and that I can have great hope in knowing I am his child. (Romans 8:38-39)

The Unquenchable Flame : Discovering the Heart of the Reformation by Michael Reeves

2010-05-08T19:49:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading this book and I enjoyed every paragraph. If you love history, especially church history, you will enjoy this book. If you don’t like to read and especially do not like history, I still think you will enjoy this book. Reeves uses words to paint such a vivid picture of the Reformation.

The Unquenchable Flame gives us a picture into a world where “justification by faith alone” was a truth that had been hidden from the Christian world for a long time. It reminds us that there was a time when hundreds of years passed in which believers had no Bible to read and were at the mercy of priest to explain God’s living word to them. It reminds us that Luther, Zwingli, Calvin, Tyndale, Knox, and the many, many who spent their lives and died for the Reformation, did so because they ached for people to know that they could not merit God’s favor through works and good deeds, but that central to the heart of the gospel is the fact that we can only be justified, or made right with God, through the blood of Christ Jesus.

A basic understanding of the Reformation should drive each of us into God’s word with greater fervor. As a Puritan once said,

“Lord, whatsoever thou dost to us, take not thy Bible from us; kill our children, burn our houses, destroy our goods; only spare us thy Bible, only take not away thy Bible.”

This statement may sound extreme in a Christian culture where we all have multiple Bibles in our home yet still “struggle” to find the time or the desire to read God’s word, but “for the Puritan, the Bible was the most valuable thing this world affords.” (Reeves) How I pray that would be true for me as well!

Prone to Wander

2010-04-30T17:36:00.000-07:00

"Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood;
How His kindness yet pursues me
Mortal tongue can never tell,
Clothed in flesh, till death shall loose me
I cannot proclaim it well.

O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above."
-Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing

Adoption is Final! :)

2010-04-30T17:31:00.000-07:00

April 29, 2010

my adoption story

2010-04-22T16:07:00.001-07:00

Do I feel the same toward Judah as I do toward Marcel and Mya?

Let’s see…

I horribly offended God by disregarding his truth and word.

I committed great offenses by trying to follow my way instead of God’s.

God isn’t only the judge—that could rightly punish me and pour out his anger and wrath on me. He is the offended, the victim of this great and vast sin.

God, the judge (and simultaneously the victim) came down off the bench after pardoning my horrible offense that ignited his wrath and instead chose to adopt me—at the expense of his very own “biological” (so to speak) son—Jesus the Christ.

God’s anger and wrath was poured out on Christ as he hung on the cross and I get to enjoy the full blessing of being a daughter of God almighty and a co-heir with Christ.

God did not adopt me because I was a “good” person. He did not adopt me because I’m better then the really evil people in the world. He did not adopt me because I chose the right religion. He adopted me simply because he is God and loved me. All he required of me was faith and faith alone—belief and trust in his son, Jesus.

This is why I believe in adoption. Because I am an eternally adopted child of the creator of the universe.

This is why I can say with full honesty and passion that I am deeply attached to, love, would die for, loose sleep over, pray over, weep over the sin of, and care for all my children equally and the same. How I long for their souls to know my Jesus. How I long for them to experience this same adoption I experienced. How privileged I am to be the mother of Marcel, Mya, and Judah.

5 Ways My Dad Fathered Me To Love Jesus--#2

2010-01-05T15:18:00.000-08:00

2. He took me on regular dates, starting at a young age.

Starting at a very young age, my father took me on regular dates. I always looked forward to these times and it became part of my normal routine. My dad would use these times to ask great questions about what I was thinking and my life. It wasn’t unusual for him to ask me about what guys I was interested in, difficult things that were happening at school, or how I felt about a particular punishment I may have received earlier that week. Because it was so “business as usual” to discuss these things, it was never awkward or strange. As I got into the high school stage—my dad didn’t even have to ask these questions anymore. He became the first person that I wanted to talk about important things with and I often sought him out to talk to before talking with friends my age.

My father also took every opportunity to spend time with me (apart from our formal “dates”). If I had a messy room to clean up, he’d often sit on a chair in my room and talk with me while I cleaned it. If I had laundry to fold, he would often sit and fold with me so that we could talk. Even as I got older and moved out of the house (pre-marriage), I could always count on calling my dad up late at night to see if he was up for hanging out with my while I shopped at Wal-Mart at 10pm or went to the laundry mat.

All of this gave him a platform to speak God’s truth into my life. Because I trusted him so much with my thoughts as my young mind was developing and trying to figure out what my worldview would be—he was able to be the primary person to help shape and guide my view of the world. I never felt a desire to rebel against him, because he took so much time to understand and know why I was thinking a specific way. I was protected from much heart ache in dating relationships, drugs, and alcohol because I knew at some point, I always ended up telling my dad about poor choices I made—and there were certain things that I never wanted to have to explain to him.

5 Ways My Dad Fathered Me To Love Jesus--#1

2009-12-17T10:11:00.000-08:00

1.He was home for dinner, every night.

I know my dad worked a lot when I was young. He started two different businesses and I am told he worked 60+ hours a week. He often was awake at 5 in the morning to start his day and would work until late in the evening. Even in all this, my father always prioritized spending time with my sister and me. He was always home for dinner. I have vivid memories of him coming home every night (the highlight of our day!) and eating dinner with us. After dinner, he’d spend time wrestling, playing, getting us ready for bed, read us stories, pray with us…and then the best part—tucked us in at night.

Now that I’m a parent, this time that we had with my dad was probably an hour and a half, maybe two hours. I think he would be home by 6 and we would be in bed between 7:30 and 8:00. Sometimes, he had to go back to work or finish work. Thinking about it, an hour-two hours a day isn’t really a lot of time for a father to spend with his children, especially if you think about how much time children spend with teachers, friends, etc. But even though I may have spent less time with my father then with other influences in my life, my father was able to be the most influential voice in my life because of the consistency and complete attention he gave us daily.

My dad never went "out with the guys", hung out at bars to watch sports, met friends for drinks/cigars during those times that he could be home with us (maybe he occasionally did it after we went to bed). Any men’s ministry activities he was a part of (and he was always involved other men’s lives) took place on Saturday mornings or before work. He took us everywhere he went on the weekends and whatever he was doing, we went along. If it was ministry, we went. If it was spending time with friends, we were there too. If it was a bible study, we could bring a backpack of quiet toys to play with at his feet while he participated or led it. Even times he had to work at his office on weekends, he’d bring sleeping bags, movies, and lunch and we’d get to “camp out” under his desk while he finished things up.

This wasn’t just when I was older, but I know he started this when I was very young. I know he made time with us a priority long before my memories were capable of remembering. I know this time he spent was the basis for which I was able to trust him so much as I got older and which opened the doors for him to shepherd me throughout my childhood.

Next post: 2: He initiated reading scripture, asking spiritual questions, and holding me accountable

The Abortion Debate

2009-12-14T19:55:00.000-08:00

Check out Vocab's debate/discussion on abortion. He is in the middle of a series of thought provoking posts. Jim Lippard, a very intelligent pro-abortionist, is debating Vocab's points on his blog. The diolouge back and forth is great!

Adopted for Life Book Discussion: Adoption, Jesus, and You

2009-12-08T08:16:00.001-08:00

“As we become more attuned to the gospel, we’ll have more of a burden for orphans. As we become more adoption-friendly, we’ll be better able to understand the gospel.”

The opening chapter introduces us to some great ideas about the interconnectedness of God’s adoption of us and how that is reflected in our adoption of children. Russel Moore begins to tell us about his own journey of preaching and thinking about the “theology” of adoption without ever thinking about how that relates to earthly adoption of orphans. He does a great job of showing how we cannot appreciate one fully without the other.

Please take a minute to comment on one of the following questions:

“Without the theological aspect, the emphasis on adoption too easily is seen as mere charity. Without the missional aspect, the doctrine of adoption is too easily seen as mere metaphor.” (p.18)

1. What do you think that statement means? How have you seen this to be true in your own life?

2. When thinking about God’s adoption of us, why is it important for us to understand it beyond “mere metaphor”?

3. How does interlinking the two help us see adoption of orphans as more then just charity or a good deed?

book discussion starting this week!

2009-11-17T15:11:00.000-08:00

We are starting the "Adopted for Life" book study this week! I will be posting an overview of each chapter on Friday or Saturdays with questions for us to discuss/think about. This week, lets read chapters 1 and 2...I'll look forward to hearing your thoughts this weekend!

Preaching vs. Worship

2009-11-06T12:56:00.000-08:00

Jeff Purswell does a great job of explaining why preaching is essential to worship:

Throughout salvation history, all the way into the new covenant, God’s Word is at the center of worship. The early church devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and every church was nourished on God’s Word, all the way down to the last chapter of the last book that Paul wrote, where he tells Timothy to preach the Word “in season and out of season” (2 Timothy 4:2).

Why? Why so much preaching? Why all this talking? Because the primary way we encounter God in worship is through the preaching of the Word of God.

Think about it this way. Normally, in what we call “worship,” we spend significant time—perhaps the whole time—addressing God, singing to him, praising him, extolling him, praying to him. Wonderful! But in preaching we are no longer addressing God; he is addressing us. Nothing is more important than this moment. And this is why the most important worship leader in your church is your pastor.

That really gets to the heart of preaching. The Bible is not simply a book that we talk about. When God’s Word is faithfully preached, God is addressing us. God is speaking. We hear not merely a man’s voice. We hear the voice of God.

Read the entire post here.

HT: Pure Church

Orphan Sunday this week at Roosevelt!

2009-11-04T09:40:00.000-08:00

November 8th is Orphan Sunday and I am VERY excited about some things that will be happening at Roosevelt this weekend!

1) We will be having a ministry spotlight talking about foster parenting/adoption with resources available for families who would like to further consider/pray about becoming foster or adoptive parents.

2) Vocab & Nicole will be teaching a RU class called, "A Biblical View on Adoption" after service (lunch will be provided). You don't want to miss it!

3) We will be launching a new Roosevelt book study. We have 6 copies of "Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families & Churches" by Russel Moore. I will be commenting/ opening up for discussing a chapter each week on my blog. I hope to have at least 6 people join me on Sunday in reading/discussing this book. (If you don't attend Roosevelt and would like to join the study, order the book now--we will be starting next week.)

**even if you think you will never foster or adopt, this book is well worth reading. 1) to support our families in the church who do and 2) to have a deeper appreciation of God's adoption of you!

Things you should never say to a family who has adopted children #7 & #8

2009-10-16T11:42:00.002-07:00

7.Racial Stereotypes

Please avoid stating any racial stereotypes you may have about my children or any other child. I have friends who have fostered or adopted children from many other races (Hispanic, Caucasian, etc) and all of them have stories of things people have said that would (hopefully) make your mouth drop open. Just apply the “if-you-wouldn’t-say-it-to-an-adult” rule…if you wouldn’t say something to my husband about black people, don’t say it to me about my kids.

The one I hear most often has to do with the assumption that black or Hispanic families are more likely to have their children in foster care (under that statement lies an assumption that black/Hispanic families are worse parents then Caucasian families). The fact is a majority of the children who enter the system in Arizona are Caucasian; however, most foster and adoptive families will only take white kids/won’t take minorities—that is why there are so many minority children waiting for adoption.

8.“Is it because of the drugs?”

I haven’t had this said to me, but several of my friends have. When their toddler is running all over the place or doing something that seems a little different then the “average” child, sometimes well meaning people ask if it is because the child was exposed to drugs in the womb. It would be the same as me walking up to you during your 2-year old's screaming tantrum and saying, “your child is so abnormal, what on earth happened to them that made them so difficult?” Any parent would be taken aback to that statement.

Things you should never say to a family who has adopted children #5 & #6

2009-10-09T11:28:00.000-07:00

5. You’re a saint. I could never go through the pain of a child returning to the birth family or hearing their stories of abuse.

Foster parents aren't saint, I promise. When people allude to the fact that there is something “tough” about foster parents for being able to “handle” the stories of abuse, it just makes me think that they don’t have any close friends who are foster parents. The kids who don’t get to be adopted, especially when they are returning to unsafe homes—breaks the hearts of foster parents. We aren’t tough. It rips our hearts out, but the pain of a grown, healthy adult who fosters is nothing compared to an abused child having no where to live and no where to be safe. This statement says that it is better to protect your own heart and life from pain then to alleviate the pain and suffering of an innocent, abused child. This is not the gospel we have been called to and I'm sure if we each really thought about it, would admit its better to risk our own pain then to let an abused child have no home to live in.

6. God’s given you a special call

Okay, this is my least favorite statement. I wasn’t “called” to adopt or foster children any more or less then every other Christian I know. Again, read above verses…God's word is filled with a command to care for orphans and the poor and the New Testament gives a beautiful example of God adopting us into his family--we are all called to care for the orphans. There are exceptions, if you have marital issues that need to be worked on, don’t want any children, or have legitimate reasons for not being able to, then that is fine. No one should do it out of guilt or obligation. But healthy, loving families who like children should be actively involved in supporting adoptions and fostering.

There are at least 5 churches that have more members in them then Arizona has kids in the foster system waiting for placement. We have no excuse. If we believe in caring for life and abortions ending, then it makes sense to start with caring for the orphans we have already.

Instead of thinking of these families who adopt as “selfless” and “special”—just think of them as normal. If couples don’t have to pray to make sure God wanted them to get pregnant in the first place…then why do couples need to be “called” to adopt? I never hear Christians say, “God called me to get pregnant.” Too often we think/pray for God to “open the door” for us if he wants us to adopt. More of us should pray, “God, I know you’ve called us to care for the orphans and it would be an honor to do this! Please let me be one who gets to serve in such a great way! I’m going to start taking action toward this and if you don’t want it to happen, close the door.”

Things you should never say to a family who has adopted children #3 & #4

2009-10-08T11:01:00.000-07:00

3. Do they have the same fathers? or Are they siblings?

There are certain close friends (especially those who understand and support adoption) that I may chose to discuss this with. However, this is can be an inappropriate question to ask a family for several reasons.

1. If Vermon and I have adopted them—then OF COURSE they have the same mother and father.

2. This question again goes back to DNA and really doesn’t matter—if they really are biologically half siblings, does that make any difference since they were raised together from birth? Do you think their little minds process that they are “half siblings?” Of course not! In fact, Niko and Mya have a “biological” 2 year old brother and whenever I say that this little boy is their brother Niko quickly corrects me that he is their cousin. He always tells me, “Mom, his parents are my auntie and uncle—he can’t be my brother!”

3. The answer very well may give you a bad opinion of the birth mother and my children may not want you to know the answer to that. Their life story belongs to them and how they chose to share it will be up to each one individually. Would you randomly ask a single mom if her three children all have the same father? If you wouldn’t ask an adult a question about their life because it might be embarrassing or hurtful for them, then it probably isn’t an appropriate question to ask about my children (since they will be adults too at some point).

4.“You know what I mean”

Whenever someone says some of the above things to me and I explain to someone that Niko and Mya are children of my own and that I would have been happy only adopting…this is always the response I get.

My answer to this statement is almost always, “no, I don’t know what you mean.” A better way to respond is, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have worded it that way." :)

Things you should never say to a family who has adopted children, #1 & #2

2009-10-06T10:54:00.000-07:00

I am new to being a parent, but in the short time there have already been many, many things said to Vermon and I about our children that feel very uncomfortable. I know everyone has the best intentions and I don’t believe anyone would say these things to be intentionally hurtful; however, in a culture where adoption is not common, sometimes it helps to be informed.

Before I start, here are some verses that would be helpful to read to understand where I am coming from:

God’s adoption of us: Romans 8:15, Romans 8:23, Galatians 4:5, Ephesians 1:5
God’s heart for orphans: James 1:27, Deut. 10:17-22, Psalms 10:14, Zec. 7:10, Proverbs 31:8-9 (there are easily 40 other verses I could list about the orphans (fatherless), poor/needy—but this is a good starting point)

My next few posts will just be a list of questions and words to remove from your vocabulary when talking about adoption.

Things You Should Never Say To a Family With Adopted Children:

1.Are you going to have children of your own?

This is perhaps one of the most offensive things I hear…and I hear it on a weekly basis (now the popular one is: “You must be excited to be having a child of your own.”) Any sentence with “children of your own” included in it (referring to biological children) is incredibly offensive and hurtful. Adopted children are children of our own—there is no difference between an adopted and biological child for parents who adopt. If you have never adopted and cannot understand loving a child as much because they don’t have your DNA—please, keep those thoughts to yourself. This statement implies that biological children belong to me more than my adopted child. This is ludicrous! How can Mya and Niko, the loves of my life, be anything less then my children? Are you less of God’s child because you are adopted by him? Read some of the above verses for a short overview on how the Bible beautifully talks about Christians being “adopted by God.” If God can see me as a “child of his own” then you should be able to see my children as “my own.”

2.Are you infertile?

There are many things wrong with this question. Two of those things are:

First, the question implies that the only reason you would adopt is because you cannot get pregnant. It makes adoption seem like a second-rate version of having children. Several of my friends, including Vermon and I, wanted to adopt long before we even met our spouses and knew if fertility was an issue or not. It is something we felt passionately about and Vermon & I chose to do it before getting pregnant—or even instead of getting pregnant. Friends of mine have chosen never to get pregnant so that they can adopt as many children as possible. I hate when people tell me that I got pregnant because “God is blessing you for adopting.” The blessing of adopting was Niko and Mya entering our life. Getting pregnant was not a reward for adopting. Of course, this baby I am carrying is a blessing—but it isn’t tied to adoption. No one would say, “oh, God gave you Niko and Mya because you decided to get pregnant and give birth! How great!” Unless you would make one statement, don’t make the other.

If you make the mistake of asking this question and get the above response, PLEASE DO NOT try to convince the person to change their minds. The person will instantly start thinking of how ignorant you are and will be very hurt or angry. They haven’t made this decision lightly, so nothing you can say will change their minds. I’ve heard terrible reasons for needing to get pregnant like: (1) don’t you want to see what a kid looks like that you create? Or 2) you can’t possibly understand how special that attachment is between mother and child until you’ve carried them in you and delivered them (I could write about why those are ridiculous statements, but to keep this from getting to long—I’ll just let you ask me personally)

Secondly, I have friends who tried for years to get pregnant and couldn’t—they really don’t like sharing this information with everyone. For some couples this is a private and painful issue and they don’t want to share it with everyone. Also, once they have adopted, many of them regret not doing it sooner, wishing they would have realized that a child is a child—regardless of DNA. Any implication that their now adopted child was a “second choice” to biological children is hurtful.

The Normal Christian Life, part 4

2009-10-02T15:30:00.000-07:00

So how then should we live?

We aren’t given a “pass” during different seasons of life to forsake our first love and make idols of our business, marriage, children, or job. This doesn’t mean we need to be legalistic and wake up with a check list of “things to do for God” each morning, but it does mean that whenever our relationship with Christ is not the most important thing in our life—there is sin and we desperately need to get back in alignment with our Lord. So, if there are no biblical categories for “on fire” Christians, but just one way that we are each called to live, then what is the “normal” Christian life?
Here is a short list…obviously this can be expanded and scripture has so much to say about each one. This also isn’t a check list that you “must do” out of legalism or obligation, but more of a way to examine your heart and test yourself.

1)We are called to be living sacrifices.—Romans 12:1-3
Every single one of us is called to be a living sacrifice to God. What an extreme and stark call this is in relation to how we are to live our lives. We are to see all of ourselves, our families, our time, our bodies, our minds, our affections as a sacrifice unto God. It is our “spiritual worship” (and this leads us to having renewed and transformed minds…which helps us discern the will of God!)

2)We are called to deny ourselves—Mark 8:34

3)We are called to be slaves of Christ—1 Corinthians 7:22

4)We are no longer enslaved by sin—Romans 8:8-11

5)We are called to follow in the steps of Christ—1 Peter 2:21

6)We are called to be servants –Galatians 5:13

7)We are called children of God…Romans 8:10-16, Galatians 4:1-7. Our adoption by God changes our entire identity. We have all the rights of sons of God! We are to have a close, intimate relationship with God—relating to him as a loving and good father!

8)We are called to bear fruit—Matthew 12:33

9)We are called to love our brothers/sisters –1 John 4:7-12

How Calvinist Simeon Related to Wesley

2009-09-25T08:22:00.000-07:00

This is a GREAT post by John Piper from the Desiring God Blog. He shows one of the most loving, humble conversations I have ever read between a Calvinist and an Armenian. It is so encouraging to think about how the gospel can unit the church in every way, even when theology differs.

Read the post here

The Normal Christian Life, part 3

2009-09-18T13:53:00.001-07:00

2. The hot and cold vs. lukewarm Christian

“I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth. For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked…” Revelation 3:15-17

Dr. Carson preached a sermon in which he discussed archeological evidence from Laodicea that brought such new and wonderful insight into this passage for me. The town directly north of Laodicea was known for having hot springs that produced fresh, hot water and the town directly south of Laodicea was known for having delicious, cold water. Laodicean’s water source came from the Lycus River, which was muddy and undrinkable—so the town had aqueducts that brought water from the hot springs five miles away. This produced lukewarm, disgusting water. There are even extra-biblical historical writings (see Josephus) where Alexander the Great wrote a letter to a friend mocking how how disgusting the water tasted in Laodicea.

Too often, Christians explain this passage to mean that there are three options when it comes to the Christian life: 1) be hot (meaning committed/on fire) 2) be cold (meaning distant/uncommitted) or 3) be lukewarm. We often describe the first two as acceptable to God and the third as unacceptable. This is not what was being said to the Laodicean church. What was being said was: I wish that you were either hot or cold (or useful for drink), but since you are not, I will spew you out of my mouth. There are not 3 options, but 2 options. This passage is not a pass to be a “cold” or distant believer for a season of life. This passage is not a statement that within the church you will find three types of believers and it is okay for some of us to be “cold” while those special leaders can be “hot/on fire.” This passage is a warning that you and your church are to be useful to the kingdom of God.

If we find ourselves living lukewarm lives, then we need to seek the Lord to make us “hot/cold.” The rest of this passage in revelation continues and says:

“…I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent.”

The Normal Christian Life, part 2

2009-09-18T13:40:00.000-07:00

Where do we see differences in how Christians are referred to in Scripture? What does this mean for us as believers?

1. The baby/mature believer

I have heard this phrase used countless times as an excuse for why some Christians are just not “ready” for ministry, or need to be in a place where they hear “shallow” sermons, or don’t study their Bibles, or continue to treat their families and others in ungodly ways. But this implies that there are two types of Christians, instead of one type of “normal” Christian. A “normal” Christian is “born” as an infant and instantly seeks the nourishment needed to steadily grow up (funny how brand new believers / “infants” are often deeply hungry for spiritual truth and changed lives vs. old Christians claiming to still be “babes in Christ”).

Scripture compares believers as baby Christian, needing spiritual milk and full grown, mature believers, able to eat “meat”. In 1 Peter 2:1-5, Peter uses the analogy not to indicate that they are immature in their faith, but that they are to long for the word of God. He tells his audience that they are to long and crave for pure spiritual milk, “like newborn infants”…but it does not end there. He tells them to crave it “so that by it you may grow up into salvation—if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.”

The other places in scripture do not look highly on those in need of “milk.” The idea of a baby believer is not a pass for someone to be this way their entire life. If you were to see a full grown man breast feeding, you would be very concerned…that is what scripture compares spiritual immaturity to. In Hebrews 5:11-14, the author calls those breastfeeding adults “dull of hering” “unskilled in righteousness” a “child”. If we meet someone who has been a believer for years and they still act and live as though they are infants, then we should question if they are truly in Christ (as well as examine ourselves if we have been using that excuse for a long time). This is not judgmental, Paul does it himself. In 1 Cor 3: 1-3 Paul actually tells the Corinthians that he can’t even address them as spiritual people, but needs to address them as unbelievers (people of the flesh) since they are still not ready for “solid food.” Paul questions if the Corinthians ever really heard the gospel because they had been entrusted with such great truth, yet were still living in a way that was not honoring and pleasing to God. Just like in nature, no where in scripture is there the idea that it is “okay” to be a five-year old infant. As we “grow older” in our faith, the “normal” Christian is called to also grow deeper (and up) in their understanding of the word of God, in loving others, in caring for others, in theology, etc. A “mature” believer should not be an exception, but expected.

“And he gave the apostles, the prophets the evangelists, the pastors and teachers to equip the saints for the work of the ministry, to building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the son of God, to mature manhood, to the measures of the same stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning by craftiness in deceitful schemes…” Ephesians 4:11-16

The Normal Christian Life, part 1

2009-09-17T10:05:00.000-07:00

I read a book in my late teens called “The Normal Christian Life” by Watchman Nee and it shaped much of my understanding of Christianity. Honestly, I don’t remember a lot of the book now and really should re-read it; however, the title sums up the most important idea of the book. The theme over and over was that there are no “levels” of Christianity. Too often, we explain the Christian walk like there is a ladder—we start on a rung very far away from God and then we climb up it as we “mature” getting “closer and closer” to God. Pastors and missionaries are called to a “higher” standard of Christianity then the rest of us “normal Christians.” There are Christians who are “on fire” and committed and Christians who are just not in a place to be involved in ministry.

But when we look at scripture, we do not see these levels of Christianity. There is one type of life that each of us are called to live and that is the “normal Christian life.” Pastors are not called to a higher standard then someone who has been a believer for a few months or ten years. We are all called to the same standard.

Over my next few posts, I will look at the places in the Bible where we do see Christians referred to in different ways (baby vs. mature, etc.) and what those passages are saying about Christian living. I will also post what I think scripture defines the “normal Christian life” as.

3 Ways to Benefit From "Boring" Passages

2009-09-15T15:34:00.000-07:00

I often hear that it is very challenging to read through the Old Testament because there are parts that can be "boring." Here is a great post from Desiring God's blog about how to benefit from these passages that are sometimes difficult to read.

http://www.desiringgod.org/Blog/1997_3_ways_to_benefit_from_boring_passages/

The Joys of Disciplining Children

2009-09-08T17:19:00.001-07:00

I really enjoy disciplining my children. I always thought that would be the worst part of parenting; however, I have quickly learned that it is a great privilege.

Obviously, I enjoy my children so much more when they are obedient, kind, and pleasurable to be around. I would take that over their disobedience, acting out, complete defiance, screaming, yelling, and crying any day. On the other hand, I find myself thankful every time I have a chance to discipline my children. I am thankful because it provides and endless amount of opportunities to bond, deepen our attachment, and most of all—teach them how to live and think in this world.

1) Children are born with a desire to follow every wish and desire that they have—which means their defiance or acting out is not a direct assault on who I am as a person. My children were born with every fiber in their body aching to meet their own desires and needs above anything else in this world. To treat my children as though, left to their own will, they should be anything but completely sinful is to act as though they are better then the gospel itself. When I have an opportunity to discipline them, I have a chance to teach them that they cannot follow their way and must submit to God’s way. Their disobedience is a wonderful opportunity to explain grace, mercy, justice…and most of all—the gospel. I’ve had such wonderful conversations with the kids during these “time out” talks.

2) I get to teach my children how to be adults. I often ask Niko to think about what would happen if he were an adult and made the same choice he just made…he often is able to describe the type of person he would grow up to be. He hit Mya out of anger once. I sat Niko down and asked him, “Do you see anyone in our family hit anyone else?” “No” he responds. “What would happen if you grew up and hit your friend, wife, or kid because you were angry?” Niko’s eyes got very wide and he seemed scared as he described that he would grow up to be a “bad guy” that hurt others. He hasn’t hit anyone since.

3) The price tag is much smaller when they are under my care. If my child chooses to throw a tantrum, act selfishly, complain needlessly, etc and I am still responsible for caring for them, then I get to walk through an incredible learning opportunity with them. As a parent, I can set up safe consequences. If they do not have an opportunity to learn with me as their teacher, then they will still be acting that way as an adult. The consequence will be much greater when they are a teenager or adult making negative or sinful choices then when they are a child.

4) The Bible doesn’t describe discipline as a negative thing, but something that a loving parent does to a child. When I am disciplining Niko and Mya, they often ask, “Do you love me?” I explain to them that it would mean I did not love them if I let them do whatever they wanted…because those actions would lead to a very bad, unhappy life. I tell them it is because I love them, that I need to teach them how to live and act.

Psalms 94:12 “Blessed is the man whom you discipline, O Lord, and whom you teach out of your law…”

Proverbs 29: 17 “Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.”

5) I am able to touch their hearts. Parenting provides many, many opportunities for behavior modification, but this is not discipline. Changing my child’s behavior only gives the parent temporary relief from the child’s embarrassing behavior; however, it does nothing to impact the child’s belief systems about how they should relate to this world. Of course, there are times when I have no choice but to ensure that my child is practicing instant obedience and I need to make sure I get the correct “behavioral” response (For example: when I yell “stop” as she is about to dart into traffic), but the best part of parenting is being able to then instruct their hearts—to explain the “whys” and “how comes” and to paint a picture that looks different then the way they are currently viewing it.

So when you’re child is throwing a full on screaming, yelling, meltdown in the grocery store isle…I won’t think less of you (as long as you actually take the time to discipline your child, instead of trying to plead with them to behave or erupt violently because they are “embarrassing” you).

Frustrating

2009-09-02T23:38:00.000-07:00

Chris Brown just got an hour in the spot light for beating up his girlfriend.

Can you please explain to me how it is the year 2009 and a guy can get on national television and talk about beating his girlfriend as a “mistake?” A “mistake” is when I’m clumsy and drop a big can of soup on someone’s foot…leaving “visible marks” on your girlfriend is abuse and assault. How does someone get convicted of assault and only get 5 years probation?

The worst part is this guy gets in front of a camera and acts sorry and remorseful and people will still buy his next album. Somehow, our culture buys it. A guy can tell some sob story and we think it was just an “accident.” The men I know who aren’t abusive would never make a “mistake” like that. And if he really were sorry, he’d begin to admit that he is an abuser and is in desperate need of help.

Why Vermon and I Chose to Home School (this year)

2009-08-20T00:15:00.000-07:00

I thought it might be a good idea to post why Vermon and I decided to home school Niko this year. Home schooling seems like such a controversial thing, especially within the church community. There are families who think it is the only way to go, families who think home schooling is a poor decision, and plenty who have never really thought about it. The last thing Vermon and I want is to be ammo for either side of the debate, but simply share why we made our choice. As children and families begin to become school age at Roosevelt, we know there will be great diversity in the types of education families choose--we just pray that we can all support and encourage each other to raise our children "in the love and instruction of the Lord."

Reasons Why We’re Home Schooling:

1 At this point, it seems to be our only option that wouldn’t cause us to compromise other values. I want Niko to get the best education possible. Education is extremely important to Vermon and me and we want our kids to be ready to go to college when they graduate. The public/charter schools closest to our home had low test scores and were barely average and this wasn’t acceptable to Vermon and me. We found a few schools that seemed to be good in other districts, but we would have had to drive Niko 20 minutes away and it concerned us that this would limit our ability to get to know the families in our neighborhood. Many of those schools were also very lacking in minorities, which was also not something we wanted to compromise on.
We found a great school downtown that we could easily see sending our
children to; however, it starts in 3rd grade. So we may end up only home schooling for one year.

2)We want Niko to love learning. I am excited to be able to use the school day to creatively teach Niko how to love learning and discovering new things. My goal this year is to help him be an avid reader and greatly curious about the world he lives in. I think the time I will have with him all day will give me endless opportunities to make learning fun.

3)I want him to learn more then just what happened in western civilization. Schools seem to greatly lack multicultural education. Some curriculum and some teachers are better about this then others; however, we still have a long way to go. I am really looking forward to teaching Niko about the eastern world along with what was happening in Europe around the same time period.

4)To lay a foundation for discipleship and growth. I want to be 100% clear that I believe this is every parents calling, regardless of whether one chooses to home school or not. If I send Niko to a school next year, I will be just as responsible for his discipleship as I am this year. I am excited about the extra time I will have to teach him the word, learn about world missions, memorize scripture, etc, but even if he was in school all day—we would find time for this, even if it means giving up some extra curricular things he did.

5) I don’t expect my 7 year old to share Jesus with his 2nd grade friends. I don’t agree with the argument that children should be in public schools so their life can be a witness to others. They are 7…they are baby, baby Christians, if they have even made a decision to follow Christ at all. Just because they are being raised by a Christian family, doesn’t mean they have made a decision to be Christians and it certainly doesn’t mean they are mature enough to influence those around them. I think that argument is the “throw your kid into a lion’s den” argument. That being said, we do teach and talk with Niko often about being a light to others and boldly sharing his faith with others. I also don’t think public schools are necessarily the “lion’s den” either, but just think this is a weak argument for those against home schooling.

Not the Reasons Why We’re Home Schooling:

1)To keep Niko in a Christian bubble. As stated above, I am not going to send my seven year old into the lion’s den; however, I also do not think it is healthy to try to ensure Niko is surrounded by Christians. Thankfully, Niko has a wonderful Christian community at Roosevelt and I am happy to have him spend endless amounts of time with my brothers and sisters who I pray influence and encourage Niko’s faith, but there are plenty of Christians to give Niko a healthy understanding of what life looks like following Christ. I don’t want every activity Niko is a part of to be filled with other Christian families…so outside of my family and my Roosevelt fam, I’m not joining any Christian home school clubs, Christian basketball clubs, etc. We’ll be hanging at the Y, chillin with our neighbors, playing at Grant Park, and maybe join the boy scouts. That opens the door for Niko to see us living and loving the world around us and for Niko to learn how to be light by being a part of constant outreach.

2)To keep Niko from learning about evolution and to ensure he knows we’re a Christian nation. We aren’t really worried about Niko learning about evolution or other things in school that we may disagree with. I strongly believe it is important to be very involved in your child’s education, so whatever he learns—I will be deeply involved in making sure he learns correctly. As for making sure he knows Christopher Columbus was a Christian—well, can’t say I am too proud of that fact since he slaughtered the Natives.

3)Because it’s the only and best way to raise our children. I just don’t believe this to be true. There are examples all around me of those who have home schooled and sent their kids to school. Both categories are filled with children and families I’d be happy to model myself after and families I’d be terrified to be like. Again, this isn’t a right or wrong, black or white, brainless decision.

4)Because whoever they spend their most time with, they will follow. I don’t think that if my child is in school all day that a teacher is going to shape them more then Vermon and I will shape them. Based on my experience as a child and Vermon’s experience—our values and beliefs were shaped by our family that raised us and our church family, not our teachers or our private/public school.

5) Because public schools are incapable of educating our son and will brain wash him. I just know too many kids in school and teachers who pour themselves into their classrooms to believe that Niko is going to fail miserably in life if we send him to school. Kids really do learn how to read in school and graduate and go to college—sometimes we demonize schools so much we forget that they can get a good education, with the right supplementation and support at home.

6)Because I want to be a stay-at-home mom. I do not believe home schooling is for every parent (or every child). We choose to home school this year because it fits into our family’s ministry. Now, for some families, home schooling is their ministry—praise God for the gifts and passions he has given them, but this isn’t the case for our family (at this point). I love being a social worker, being involved in ministry at Roosevelt, and being a foster parent. Some things I am willing to give up, but some I have strong convictions that I am supposed to be a part of. Because of those convictions, if home schooling makes it too difficult to foster parent, then to school Niko goes. It isn’t that I’m not willing to make sacrifices (otherwise I wouldn’t be home schooling now), but because I feel God has called the entire Pierre family to some specific things above and before home schooling (every families calling is different).

The Joy of the Lord

2009-08-13T21:48:00.000-07:00

I received some feedback and questions after my last post related to what happens when we read God's word/ pray out of obligation instead of relationship.

Reading God's word and spending time in prayer is meant to be a joy and a blessing! Not something we "have" to do, but something we delight in doing. For example, I delight in spending a night out with Vermon, discussing our passions and dreams--sure I "have" to do it to keep our marriage healthy, but it never feels as though I "have" to because I so deeply love him and receive so much joy from those times we have together. How much more with my Eternal Groom! I could approach it as something I “have” to do and then wallow in shame and guilt when I don’t, but if that is the approach we are taking to our relationship with the Lord…then there are some deeper things to fix. (Just like if spending time with Vermon ever becomes something I “have” to do, right along side paying bills and grocery shopping—Houston, we have a problem)

That being said, it is a problem that really does happen (both in relationship with humans and our Lord)—I’m not comparing a desire for my spouse with a desire for the Lord to make anyone feel guilty if they lack that desire or do not receive joy and fulfillment from their time with the Lord. I just want to paint a picture of how devastated a marriage would be if it were at that point and encourage you to view your spiritual state in the same way. When cultivating intimacy with the Lord becomes a chore (and there are times it will!), then we are in desperate need of spiritual repair. It isn’t something we can passively sit by and just “wait on the Lord” to return some desire to our hearts…we are bleeding out in the emergency room and are going to die without some immediate intervention.

So what happens when we don’t delight and find joy in the Lord…what happens when we wake up and realize that are relationship is in a devastated state?

1) Don’t let guilt and shame keep you from looking at the issue. Shame tells us to continue to keep our heads down looking at ourselves, wallowing in the pitiful excuse we are for Christians. The Gospel tells us to stop looking at ourselves and start looking to Christ. If you are crippled by guilt and shame then study grace and what that means. Shame does not and will not lead to holiness —God’s grace is that he took our shame and guilt upon himself and transformed it—that is what will lead us to holiness.
“For by grace you have been saved, through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” Eph 2: 8-10

2) Repent of religion and irreligion. (I’m stealing this from Tim Keller…which he took from the Bible, so I guess it isn’t stealing ) Repent of your desire to be perfect and righteous for your own good, of your spiritual pride, of your idolization of religion, and of your desire to appear like a super star Christian. Repent also of the ways you have ignored God and made idols of worldly things in your life.

3) Remove all excuses from your vocabulary (see previous post), lean on your church community, carve out time daily…even if all you do during that time is pray for a desire to desire God. Know that the time you spend with the Lord is for His glory (not just for your own warm and fuzzies) and ask the Lord to help you delight in him. Read the Psalms, meditate on them, write them out, sing them...read Hosea and the other prophets and ask God to continue to reveal sin and grace. Faithfully pursue God and trust his promise to fill you with a deep joy as you delight in Him.

Romans 6:
“We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace”

A Mother's Search for Time in the Word

2009-08-10T17:01:00.001-07:00

I often hear from moms that it is so challenging to find time in the word and prayer. I also hear that from college students, singles early in their careers and professional development, newly weds, and middle-aged empty nesters. I know at every stage of my life, finding time in the word has been challenging and I know women at every stage of life who find the time and their speech, actions, and love are evident of women who are soaked in the Word of God.

I do have very, very fond memories of my single days and being able to spend hours, even an entire day studying God’s word. I definitely had more time at different seasons of my life, but even when I had the most time—I had seasons where I neglected time in prayer and time in the word. Time is something we all lack and distraction and noise constantly fight for our attention and affections. No matter how much “free time” one has, it is painfully easy to give in to your flesh and fill it with meaningless, flesh-gratifying things. It is even easy to fill that time with good things, but not the most important things.

Over the years of preparing to be a mother, I have heard very poor advice regarding early motherhood and being in the word. I have heard many people say things such as,

“it is important, but don’t feel guilty, it is a season of life. There will be a time again to spend more time in the word.”

“It is so hard, but there are practical things you can do…like write a verse on an index card and read that all week, over and over…at least that is something”

“God has called you to focus on your family and care for their needs right now…it is a season of life.”

My problem with all of that advice is it simply is not biblical. There are things about being a mother of young children that have their unique challenges in regards to time and energy, but the purpose of this season of your life is to bring glory to your God. Mother, professional, single, teenager, college student—you are a warrior in God’s army! And being a mother now increases the amount of people you are directly responsible for praying over and training up to be good soldiers. If anything, motherhood should drive us into the word and prayer more, not less.

If my kids grow up to tell stories about my dishes not always being done, or times that we all had to spend all day at a laundry mat because the laundry piled up, but they can remember me in the word, speaking the word, walking in the spirit, and on my knees—praise God! If my children grow up, remembering that we had to always cook frozen pizza or order Chinese food when company came over, because mom ran out of time to go grocery shopping or make an elaborate meal…but they remember being with me when I was praying with my sisters, deeply interceding before the Lord—Glory be to God! There are many practical, every day life skills that I need to teach my children, but their priority pales in comparison to making sure their mother is soaked in God’s word and deeply seeking the Lord in prayer.

Mothers are called to do far, far more then read one verse on an index card all week or to just chalk this to a “season of life.” Our first and foremost identity is that we are children of the Almighty God, we are daughters of our King, we are sisters of Jesus Christ! The more time we spend deep in the word, digging into theology, and praying to our father, the deeper Love we will have for our God. Deeper love for our God will directly lead to a deeper love for others, your family will benefit greatly from that increase in love.

It is only when our first love is the Lord and our priorities reflect it, that we can raise children in the love and instruction of the Lord.

But saying this and reading this is so much easier in principle then it is in practice. I fail often at making this my priority and I fear my children growing up with a mother that does not keep her eyes Jesus daily. It scares me to think of how often I parent out of my own wisdom and do not depend on the Lord for his wisdom, sustenance, and guidance.

These are just ideas of things that I have tried. I don’t do all of them every day or week, but daily I try to do something.

1) Use your Husband. If you have a husband, especially one that loves Jesus…one of his deepest desires for you and your marriage should be that you are growing in your relationship with the Lord. Be honest with him about what you need to prioritize this in your life.

a. Let him get the kids breakfast a few mornings a week while you read your bible or let him play with them after dinner or take them to the park so you have some time to read the word (not clean, do laundry, etc)

b. Plan Daddy Date Nights. Let your husband have one night a week (or month) that he comes home from work, cooks dinner (or reheats something if cooking it is too big of a stretch for him!), feeds the kids, has special daddy time, and puts them to bed. You can grab your Bible, a sandwich, a journal, some commentaries, and head to a local coffee shop for 3 or 4 hours of study. Not only is this great for your kids to have that time with their dad, but you need that time in the word! You can return the favor to your husband by encouraging him to escape from the house early on a Saturday morning or come home late one night from work…giving him several hours in the word.

c. After the kids go to bed, pray together, read from God’s word together (you can even do this while the other folds laundry), even if it is just the first 20 minutes after your kids fall asleep—get in the discipline of incorporating God’s word and prayer as a steady diet in your marriage. Ask your husband what he is reading in God’s word and what he is learning and then tell him what you are learning (even if he doesn’t ask). Use each other to hold one another accountable.

2) Go to McDonalds. Not that I am a big fan of their nutritious meals, but once a week…I bring Niko and Mya to McDonalds after lunch (or school) for an ice cream cone and let them play for an hour. That gives me a good hour to read. This isn’t good for uninterrupted, focused study…but it is a great time for reading more about a specific doctrine or theology. I have also found it to be a good time to work on scripture memory.

3) Quiet times. Niko is 7 and still has a “nap” time. I try at least 3 days a week to use that time to read and pray. This is prime time for "mom chores", so you really have to discipline yourself to use this time for prayer and study and fight the temptation to get things done on your "to-do" list. Just remember that time in the word is a priority to a clean house, laundry, and dinner...plus, if you are anything like me—it is much easier for you to talk yourself into neglecting some sleep to do some chores then it will be to stay up to read the word (our flesh is so weak!).

4) Use your church family. If it has been weeks since you have been in the word—you are in crisis and who most wants to support you then your sisters! Call some other moms in the church (call me!) and schedule a “play date.” One mom can play with all the kids (or take them to the park) while the other mom goes into a room and reads/prays for an hour…then you can switch. Ask your home group for help. Schedule times to pray with other women in the church. If you’re a single mom or have a husband who is not a believer…do all of the things I suggested for “Using your Husband” with church family. Let us be a church to you. Let us be the Body to you. Confess any pride that holds you back from asking your sisters for help!

5) Full time work and full time mothering is exhausting, even if you feel called to what you do and love your job. I found it difficult to find time to take a shower, never mind time to read the Bible and pray. If you have a commute, use your drive to pray...have an index with an outline of things to pray for and pray out loud your entire drive. Skip the time it takes to stop at Starbucks, get to work 30 minutes early and read in your car. Read during your lunch break. Honestly, none of that really worked for me (but I know others who do it)--I just had to sacrifice sleep and try to carve out extra time on the weekends for solitude.

6) Include your kids. My favorite thing to do after breakfast is go back in bed and read my Bible and pray. I tell Niko and Mya that this is very special time with God and it is important for every Christian to have time in the word. I invite Niko and Mya to lay in bed with me, but only as long as they want to sit and read with me. I set my alarm for an hour and tell them they can interrupt me when the hour is up. Niko and Mya get their bibles and both spend 10-20 minutes reading their bibles quietly (or looking at the pictures)…and then they quietly go off to their room to play together or by themselves. When the hour is up, they excitingly bounce into my room with a long list of what they want to play with me. (I also read a book by Noel Piper where she suggested getting the Bible on tape for your pre-readers to listen to…I want to try this for Mya)

Anyone else have things that have worked for them? Please share!

my favorite new name

2009-07-19T13:21:00.000-07:00

I have been a mom for a little over three months and it has been such a life changing experience. I was reflecting today on what the Lord has done in the lives of our children since we first met them and I couldn't help but praise God for how powerfully he has revealed his love to me though my little girl and little boy.

Anyone who has met Mya, our four year old, becomes instantly aware that she has a strong and wonderful personality. She loves being the center of attention, loves making people laugh, and loves saying things that you would hear out of the mouth of a teenager.

After living with us every weekend for three months, Mya and Niko moved in full time at the beginning of April. We told them when we first began taking care of them on the weekends, that we were going to become their new mommy and daddy, but we never told them what to call us. Since we had such a long/strange "in-transition" stage where we weren't their parents, but were trying to be...we figured they were confused and when the dust settled, would instinctively know what to call us.

Niko and Mya instantly called Vermon "daddy." It was so precious to hear and I loved seeing Vermon's big smile every time they heard it...it didn't go so quickly with me. I figured, with their history, it would take longer to start calling me "mom," but knew it would happen. Even though I was slightly jealous of Vermon, I figured, even mother of infants don't get to hear themselves called mom for almost a year--and even then, for some reason, "da da" is among babies first words.

The journey of becoming "Mommy" went something like this...

Mya would be having a tantrum and I would be disciplining her, explaining her sin and hard heart and her need for Jesus. "You'll NNNNNEEEEEEVVVVVEEEERRR be my mommy!" She would scream at the top of her lungs.

Later in the day, Vermon would home, "Daddy!" and then she'd look over at me and stick her hand on her hip and say, "he's my daddy! You're not my mommy!"

Other times we would be playing dolls or with stuffed animals and she would "make-believe" I was her mommy...and giggle or laugh every time she called me it, but made sure to tell me it was just a game. She wanted to test it out, but wasn't ready to commit.

"Dennae" she would say, "yes, daughter" "You can be my mommy yesterday (she mixes up yesterday and tomorrow)" I would gently explain that I already am her mommy, just like God wants to be our father, whether we realize it or not.

Our entire first month and a half was like this. I knew Mya desperately wanted a mommy, she longed to call me mommy and longed to belong to me. She would desperately want me to hold her, but would resist asking me with every bone in her body. I could see the turmoil within her.

Then, on Mother's Day, Mya started calling me "Mommy" and instantly began acting like I was her mommy. The transformation in her heart was beautiful. Vermon and I often say, that she has become more beautiful in the last few months...as she realizes this is forever, as she realizes she belongs to someone, as she learns her new identity as a "Pierre", she smiles more and more.

Now...only two months later, I can't even go into the bathroom without Mya wanting to follow me in. Several times a day, Mya runs up to me, kisses me, and says, "You're the best Mommy in the WHOLE world." When she's in time out, now she argues, "But Mommy, I need you to be with me. But Mommy, I won't be able to see you!"

I love hearing Niko and Mya call me "mommy". I can't hear it enough. I never thought I would like the sound so much. It has been such a lesson in how I pray to the Lord. How overjoyed God must be to hear his little children call him "Abba (daddy)" Father.

more pics from la jolla

2009-06-17T16:01:00.000-07:00

pictures from our la jolla trip

2009-06-17T15:53:00.000-07:00

Praising God...

2009-06-12T20:03:00.000-07:00

There have been countless moments of joy over the last two months as I have become a mother. Getting to know Niko and Mya have been life changing and it has been such a sweet time in Vermon and my lives.

We just got back from La Jolla in which we were able to spend a wonderful week on the beach with the kids (ah..gone are the days of reading 5 or 6 books on our weekend getaways :)).

This is a picture of Mya on the beach. There was a good half hour where Mya just sang at the top of her lungs praise songs to God, "God, you're the lover of my soul" or "God, you're so nice! God you made us! God we neeeeeeeeeed you." It didn't matter who walked by...Mya just sang as loud as she could. Sometimes it was while making sand castles, sometimes with her hands in the air just gazing out into the ocean.

Childlike faith. I wonder at what age she will become too self conscious to do that. What age did I become too self aware of others to determine when and where I praised the Lord so publicly? How glorious heaven will be when all of creation screams to the Lord in worship with no fear of man!

"At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5: 1-4

Family Like No Other Family

2009-05-04T13:46:00.000-07:00

It has been almost a month since Niko and Mya have moved in with us full time. It has been such a wonderful, blessed time. I knew that fostering/adopting would be full of joy, but I had no idea just how much fun it would be and just how much the Lord would grow my heart to love overnight.

Since January when we started down this road of becoming parents, it has been filled with one blessing after another. The greatest blessing from God has been our church family and I just want to brag a little bit about them...

In order to have Niko and Mya live with us, we needed a 3 bedroom home. We had put an offer on a home/gone under contract with a bank the same week that we decided to move forward with having Niko and Mya move in with us. We were supposed to close at the end of February and have the kids move in sometime in March, but needless to say, nothing ever goes as planned.

Buying a foreclosed home turned out to be a nightmare. As of March, we found out it could be June until we moved into this home. By this point, Niko and Mya had been spending every weekend with us and we were already committed to being their "mommy and daddy." It was such a trial and so frustrating to try to figure out why this was happening and how we could get them to live with us as quick as possible.

As we asked those around us to pray, a couple in our church offered to switch houses with us. They had a 3 bedroom home just down the street. Within two weeks of joking about it, we were packed and ready to move. These were brothers and sisters in Christ we had just met and here they were just giving us their home. They packed up everything they owned in two weeks and swapped houses.

We moved four days before we had the kids move in with us full time. So many people showed up from church to help us move that both of our homes were completely moved in under two hours. After that, about ten women stayed and helped me unpack and put everything in the entire house away. By the time the weekend was over, we were moved in and ready for the licensing company to inspect our new home Monday morning.

It was a whirlwind and one of the most amazing things I have been a part of. To be on the receiving end of such a beautiful example of Christ-centered community moved me beyond words. I was able to go to work and tell all my co-workers about this great act of love.

Another sister from church gave me her car for nine months. Vermon and I had been happily sharing one car, but she was given a company car to drive back and forth to work in and wasn't using hers during the week. Instead of just letting it sit in her garage all week like most people would have (probably even me before all this), she gave it to me to use (and she kept paying her own insurance).

Other church family have instantly adopted Niko and Mya into their own families...seeing no distinction between their "biological" nieces and nephews and Niko and Mya. Others showed up our first three weeks to give us meals. Someone else arranged for firefighters to drop off bikes at our house for the kids. Others helped so much this first month as I have tried to finish out my work commitment/ late schedule with watching Niko and Mya, housekeeping, helping Vermon with some of his church commitments, and the list could go on and on…almost all of this happened without Vermon or I asking or suggesting this.

It has been a great illustration in our children’s lives as we talk with them about how nothing we have belongs to us, but it all belongs to God. We then talk about the many, many friends we have who have shown this to us. We talk about what it means to live life as though we had nothing, yet we have been richly blessed with everything. We tell them that we have more riches then we could ever hope for or imagine and all of this belongs to God and his purposes.

Recently, we were at the park and a homeless man approached us for money, I offered him one of our sandwiches instead and after he left Niko eagerly said, “but mommy…our money belongs to God, not you…shouldn’t you give him some, like Faith and Ryan gave us their house?”

Jesus Loves Me - by the new Pierre kids!

2009-04-18T12:47:00.000-07:00

Something to pray about...

2009-01-26T20:16:00.001-08:00

Vermon and I have had a whirlwind of the last 3 weeks! We have been presented with the wonderful opportunity to become foster parents to a beautiful 4 year old girl and her wonderful 7 year old brother. The timing is about 7 months ahead of schedule for when we were planning on having kids and it isn't at all perfect with our lives and my career, but after meeting these wonderful children and seeing months continuing to pass with no option for them, Vermon and I felt we needed to strongly consider and pray about it...

There were a lot of factors that needed to fall into place before we could say yes. We needed a 3 bedroom house to pass state licensure standards, I needed to be able to come home from work earlier then 9pm, and Vermon needed a little creativity/flexibility with his schedule until I finish out some commitments I have at Sojourner. We started praying and both felt that these two precious children were clearly put in our path for a reason and we need to do whatever we can to ensure they have a Christ-centered, loving, safe, and nurturing home that they could go to together.

Please pray for us! Working as much as I do and getting ready to parent kids with deep needs is a little overwhelming right now, but I know God will give us the energy and strength. The kids have begun spending every weekend with us and will do that through March. In March we should close on our house and finish the licensing and then they will be with us permanently.

So...in the next 30 days we will be moving into a 3 bedroom just down the street, buying dozens of children's books, making many trips to the park, vastly shifting our priorities, reading parenting books, and adding two special additions to our family!

What a privilege God has given us!

(Once it is official I will post pictures and more details to the story (which is so obviously the Lord's doing!))

My People Group

2009-01-14T07:44:00.000-08:00

"A Christian is immortal until his work is done."
-James Fraser

I just finished reading a biography about James Fraser, a missionary to China in the early 1900's. I was very encouraged and challenged to read story after story about this man's passion for these remote tribes of people. He would spend hours and days praying and fasting for God to move among the Lisu and spent five years there before he saw any fruit of his work and prayer.

I have always been captivated by stories of missionaries who have devoted their life to a people group in India, Africa, Latin America, etc. There are stories told about people who spend hours and days in prayer, asking God to move greatly among these people they have been "called" to...only to see God move in powerful ways. I have read about entire tribes of people that decided to follow Christ who then ended their practices of child sacrifice, female circumcision, or infanticide. It is always compelling to me to hear of how God works greatly through men and women who have given all of their energy, time, and life fully to be used to worship and serve God.

As I read about James Fraser's life, I was especially convicted this time about the way I see who I have been "called" to. I often think, prayer and total dependence on the Lord, is the only way many of these men and women have been able to stay in some of these countries that they have been in to minister. But why is my life any different? Why do I not think of the people of Phoenix as being my people group that I am called to? America is no different then these remote tribes all over the world...they need a powerful encounter with Christ. Just like child sacrifice and female circumcision can end overnight when a "people" trust Jesus to be their savior...so can child abuse, neglect, domestic violence, substance use, social injustice, etc...when God really moves on a "people."

Prior to reading this book, I do not think I have ever thought of praying for God to move greatly in this city that I am living in. I have never asked God to redeem downtown Phoenix and make it whole and a beautiful reflection of who he is. I have passionately prayed for individual people, I have felt "called" to the women and children I work with, but I have never invested myself so fully as to see that I was placed in Phoenix by the Lord specifically to advance his kingdom and bring glory to his name in this city, among these people.

If only we could stop distinguishing between those "missionaries" all over the world and ourselves.

Pierre Family Update

2008-12-25T16:46:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas to our friends and family!

We wanted to take the time in the midst of this wonderful season to stop and share our thankfulness for each of you for the love and support you have offered and provided for us at different time throughout our lives.

We wanted to share a quick update about the past year of our life and share some things to pray with us about:

* We celebrated our first year anniversary in August! Our first year of marriage was incredible and so much fun. We were truly blessed by the Lord as he spent our first year of marriage knitting our hearts together and revealing more of himself to us each day. Please pray that the Lord would be glorified in our marriage and that our family and home would be a tool for God to minister to others through.

* We have recently completed all of our classes and paperwork to become foster parents. The next step is to get our home licensed so we can have children placed with us. We are currently reading and praying a lot about parenting and are looking forward with anticipation to the children God may bring our way! Please pray that God would provide us with a place to live with a third bedroom (we want to be able to take siblings and due to state licensing standards would need a third bedroom).

* Dennae spent most of the year working as a family advocate with children at Sojourner Center (a domestic violence shelter) and recently was promoted to be the Program Coordinator, overseeing the transitional housing programs. It has been a challenging and wonderful learning experience and she enjoys being able to be a part of the women and children's healing and growth. Please continue to pray that God would use her greatly in the lives of these women and children to holistically heal from the trauma and abuse they have experienced.

* Vermon continues to serve as the lead pastor of Roosevelt Community Church in downtown Phoenix. This past year was the first year in which the church existed without support from her mother church, Camelback Bible Church. We saw the Lord provide for our needs and continue to build us into a church family with people coming from many different social, cultural, and ethnic backgrounds but united together around the great gospel of Christ. It has been a challenging and even at times overwhelming task to effectively lead this young church, but above all it's been exciting to see the Lord so clearly at work within our body. Vermon is thankful to the Lord to be where he is, doing what he's doing. Please continue to pray that the Lord would grow Vermon and the other leaders at Roosevelt in wisdom and courage as they follow God's will for the church.

* Lastly, we have been praying and thinking a lot about how to minister and reach out into the community we are living in. We live in downtown Phoenix and are praying for God to open up many doors to minister to the diverse populations downtown. Please pray with us for God to deepen our love for these people we are called to and that he would mightily move in Phoenix and call many to himself!

We hope you had a wonderful Christmas.

Blessings,
Dennae and Vermon Pierre

Be pro-life in deed, not just word

2008-11-06T08:49:00.000-08:00

The political season is finally over and I have heard so many Christians passionately discussing the abortion issue. I am thankful they are discussing it, because it is THE social injustice of our time, but something great is missing.

As I reflect back to many other great social evils in our country’s history such as slavery, lynching, segregation, slaughtering of Natives, etc…abortion stands out to me as yet another great, great evil that continues to flourish in our nation.

The election season really saddened me as I hear Christians by the thousands get passionate about an issue they are willing to do very little about. Why is it only during the election season that we have outspoken individuals who are suddenly indignant about the issue, yet do very little about the issue the rest of the year? Why can we spend hours at a dinner table talking about it, but can’t spend one hour a week volunteering to do anything about it?

I keep hearing a very sad phrase, “they were called to adoption/fostering” or “they didn’t feel called to adopt.” My bible does not say you have to be “called” to foster or adopt. In fact, my Bible says to "care for the orphans." Christians keep saying that they care about the life of the millions of unborn, but do they? How much can you care about the life of the unborn if you are not caring for the life of the born, especially the abused, neglected, and abandoned.

During slavery, when the underground railroad was happening and slaves were trying to escape from the south into the North, Christian men and women risked all that they had to help them. It would have been ridiculous for someone to sit back and say, “God hasn’t called me to help my black brother” yet passionately discuss the need to end slavery. And it is equally ridiculous for someone to sit back and say, “God hasn’t called me” to take care of the orphans we already have, meanwhile passionately discussing the need to end abortion.

If you are passionate about abortion ending…yes, it is important to look at who we elect and what they want to do about the issue, but way, way, way more important then that, we need to actually take action. There are many different ways to do this, but every pro-life Christian should and needs to do more then just talk about the Republican vs. Democrat issue.

Take Action:
1) Be a foster parent
2) Adopt a child(ren)
3) Come along side a foster/adoptive family and go above and beyond to support them
4) Be a mentor (Big Brother/Big Sister) to a child who is living in poverty (which means they are at high risk of getting pregnant, getting someone else pregnant, and having an abortion)
5) Be a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) and advocate for a child who is currently being abused
6) Volunteer at Crisis Pregnancy Center and counsel and pray for young girls who face this issue
7) Come together with your friends, fast and pray about this issue and talk about what you can do to end it.
8) Go to law school, be a social worker, or find a way to dedicate your life to this issue

2008-07-12T20:13:00.000-07:00

I was talking with a friend at church on Sunday who is from Indonesia. She was talking about her experience being a Christian in a county that has such limited religious freedom. We talked about people she knew who had been beaten for their faith, churches that had been burned down, and pastors that had been killed. She told me a story about this major Muslim political party that is represented by holding up your finger, making a number one sign. If you do not hold up the sign back to them when they show it to you, you may get beaten. She talked about the tension of having to decide if that was worth getting beaten for, or is it wiser to just do it and if you get beaten, get beaten for worshiping Christ.

...it makes my struggles about when to talk about my faith and with who seem ridiculous. I just wonder how different our life would be if we could go to eternity and look backwards at our life. The fear we had to share the love of Christ with a student or co-worker because they might be offended or think less of us, seems pretty insignificant in light of eternity. How many people work and live along side us on a daily basis and have no idea what we believe and how our belief in Christ shapes our entire being and everything that we do?

Christianity that just blends into everything else is pretty empty and meaningless. If our understanding that the creator of the universe wants to be in relationship with us is not enough to embolden us to preach the gospel every minute of our lives, why even be a Christian? If our fear is keeping us from telling others about God, then that means we really do not believe God to be who he says he is.

Acts 1

2008-03-15T22:17:00.000-07:00

It had been an exhausting and invigorating month and a half for Jesus’ disciples. Their time was filled with days of rejoicing and peace along with days of darkness and fear. I imagine there was much confusion those last days that Jesus walked the earth, but there was also much revelation as Jesus opened the disciple’s eyes and taught them from the scripture and showed them how everything in the law and the prophets pointed directly toward a Messiah.

If we were watching this drama unfold from the disciple’s eyes, Acts chapter one would be such a beautiful twist in the plot. The disciples had just spent forty days with the resurrected Jesus listening to him speak of the kingdom of God, not to mention years previously following Christ and listening to his teachings. They had already mourned his death once, and now he prepared to ascend into heaven and again they would be left. But Jesus leaves them with a promise: “But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”

I wonder if the disciples left Mount Olivet rejoicing and praising the Lord or in solemn silence? Were they filled with fear and suffering from loosing the tangible Jesus or were they hopeful in anticipation of this great gift that was about to come? We do not have much detail as to the mood of the disciples, but we do know that the disciples returned to Jerusalem to await the promised Spirit in an attitude of prayer.

These men and women gather together in an up stairs room from where they were staying and devoted themselves to prayer. Howard Marshal writes, “If the Holy Spirit is the divine gift which empowers and guides the church, the corresponding human attitude toward God is prayer. It is as the church prays that it receives the Spirit.”

As I have been studying and meditating on these passages in Acts, I am struck and convicted again and again by how closely prayer is connected to the Spirit moving and how much the children of God should long for the Holy Spirit to move in their life.

John 16:7-11, Jesus says, “Nevertheless, I tell you the truth; it is to your advantage that I go away, for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you. But if I go, I will send him to you. And when he comes, he will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment: concerning sin, because they do not believe in me; concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father and you will see me no longer; concerning judgment because the ruler of this world is judged.”

What a powerful thought! Believers today are at greater advantage to understand and live the gospel then the disciples that were in the physical presence of Jesus because we have the Holy Spirit. Yet so often, we live our Christian life not empowered by the Spirit because we do not take the time to seek God and pray.

Tim Keller poses a question in a study he wrote on Acts, “If the Holy Spirit left your life today, would it look any different?”

Are you convicted of sin? Are the fruits of the spirit evident in your life (Galatians 5)? Do your conversations with friends, family, acquaintances, and strangers exhibit a life filled with the Holy Spirit? Do you long to spend time in the word of God? Does God’s word pierce your heart like a sword? Do you make decisions about how you will spend your time, money, and life based on obedience to the Lord? Are you moved with compassion for all the lost around you? Is your boldness to proclaim the gospel growing?

The answers to these questions point to whether your life is a Spirit-led life or not. And we cannot force ourselves to have the "right" answers...this is not a check list of do's and don'ts, when we examine a spirit led life we should be humbled and broken to know that we cannot do this just by willing it ourselves, it is only through the power of God and the holy spirit...so let us continue to pray for that in our lives. May we as Christian brothers and sisters be devoted to prayer. May our church and our lives be directed and guided by the Holy Spirit and nothing less.

Six months of bliss…

2008-02-15T22:24:00.000-08:00

I know it has been a while since I have posted! Married life is slowing me down. :) Actually, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Life is going at lightning speed. I really cannot believe Vermon and I have been married for six months.

(Disclaimer: What I am about to say is simply how marriage has illustrated some things to me, I am not saying that you can know God deeper if you are married. In fact, I encourage every single person not to waste a moment of the precious gift of singleness to questioning God's plans for your life...but to embrace this special time to be one with your God.)

I have never experienced such a sweet unity and oneness with anyone before as I have in marriage with Vermon. It has been such a wonderful and fun journey to see God knit our hearts together and make us more and more like-minded. As we are growing together in our marriage I have had many opportunities to examine what communion with the Lord should look like in my life. I look at my marriage and see how many of my decisions and actions are motivated by a desire to stay one, to love Vermon, and to serve and minister with him in this life. When I examine my marriage, it gives me many examples that I can look at to judge if my decisions and actions are in alignment with my even greater desire to be one with the Lord.

Something that has really struck me over the last six months is just how precious and sweet life can be when you are truly living in communion with the Lord. I look at the sacrifices I am willing to make to spend time with my husband and I see such great fruit in our marriage and feel so satisfied. How much more satisfied would we be if we made time to spend with our God. I think the greatest gift that God has given me in marriage is helping me to see a glimpse of the depth and union I can have with my heavenly father. More and more I am seeing that my motivation in life cannot be anything other then glorifying and worshiping my God. When that is the focus of my life, I find myself in the midst of this beautiful and meaningful life, no matter our circumstances.

The purpose of marriage is to point people toward Jesus. When a marriage is Christ-centered, it gives the community they are in a small glimmer of what life within the church should be like. Instead of our children within the church growing up cynical and hesitant about marriage, they grow up seeing this beautiful sacrificial love as a physical example of what a relationship with Jesus is like. Instead of single people feeling forgotten, they are surrounded by marriages that constantly remind them of the most intimate and whole union they can have only with Christ. When our friends that do not know Christ struggle, they can look to a self-sacrificial and unconditional love exhibited between two people and long to know this God that can produce such beauty.

I just want to continue to thank all of you who pray for us, our marriage, and the ministry that God is doing all around us. It means so much to us and we see God working. :)

A Dead Life…part one

2007-10-26T13:33:00.001-07:00

“And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—among whom we all once lived, in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.” (Ephesians 1)

Death is a powerful word.

When death is encountered, all of your senses are engaged. There is an overwhelming stench to death. There is an unmistakable look to death. There is a unique taste to death. There are distinct sounds to death . There is a chilling touch to death.

To some, death is an end; to others, death is the beginning. I know those who live in fear of death and I know those who celebrate death, but I know no one who anticipates the death of their beloved friend or mate. I know no one that longs for death to consume the life of the child they tuck into bed at night.

Whenever I read that first phrase in Ephesians 2, I pause, and think about my life before Christ. I was dead. I used to walk down a path seeped with death.

We were dead. Think of the seeming contradiction in that first sentence of Ephesians 2. “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked.” Here Paul is stating that each of us were dead, yet we were able to walk in sin and trespasses. I think of a meth user. Her entire family can look at the sunken eyes, the body wasting away, the clammy skin, the red-shot eyes and mourn the deathly path she walks. The road she travels is killing her. In many ways—she is already dead. Dead to feeling, dead to emotion, dead to reason, dead to the needs of those who rely on her.

As you watch that documentary of the meth user you realize, this is simply a physical example of who you were spiritually. You walked down that road, dead. The sin that you were entrenched in suffocated you. No, you were not the most evil being you could be, but you were not holy, not pure, not able to breathe the goodness of God and drink the living water you so desperately needed to LIVE.

The world is set on a certain course…a course directly opposite of where God is heading. James 4: 4 boldly says, “You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore, whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.”

But when you are following the course of the world, you do not think of yourself as an enemy of God. Part of following the world is deceiving others without hesitation and gladly being deceived yourselves. We allow ourselves to feel justified in our pride, selfishness, desire to control and manipulate, lack of integrity, desire to act on our passions and desires. It is easy to justify when we are following a mass of people who are heading in the same direction as we are. How can we be wrong when everyone else says it is right? Yes, we are adulterous people. Friendship with the world is enmity with God.

I can hear the passion in Paul’s voice as he says, “among whom we all once lived!” We cannot just watch that drug addict wasting away into nothing feeling detached because it is something we would never fall to. No, it is precisely the depravity of this world that eats away at our soul quicker the methamphetamine does to the body of a meth addict. Before we look at these “poor helpless souls” that need our pity, we need to be broken and humbled that this is who we were! We ALL once lived as though we were dead. We were dead because our sins choked our lives, the passions of our flesh consumed us, we carried out the desires of the body and the mind without regard to the consequences to those we loved, and we were by nature children of wrath (our nature was a nature that was in opposition and rebellion to a loving, gracious, and holy God).

We need to be present with the evilness in which we all were consumed. There is a difference between a recovering alcoholic reaching out to another broken alcoholic to show them the path to healing and light and the PhD clinician trying to medicate the alcoholic. Let us not be the second in our approach to mankind. Let us look at the depravity that was rotting away the depths of our hearts and souls and rejoice that we can now live a life of abundance. Let us not be detached from those who are dead, but let us smell, taste, see, hear, and feel the pain that consumes the lives of those who are walking dead in their sins. Let us examine our own relationships, thoughts, motives, beliefs, actions and be sensitive to any sign of death eating away at our souls.

I don't want to be a cool christian...

2007-10-19T21:56:00.000-07:00

I don’t want to be a cool Christian; just to prove to the world that I am not a psycho fundamentalist.

I don’t want to wear the Abercrombie jeans, holding my Starbucks cup, with the trendy jewelry and hair; just to prove that I am relevant, current, and hip.

I don’t want to hand a few bucks to the homeless guy, just to relieve my guilt.

I don’t want to hang out with the Hindu, the Buddhist, the Muslim, or the Mormon; just to enlighten each other with the similarities in our faith.

I don’t want to change my look, language, or values; just to prove I am not a sexist, racist, heterosexualist, or religionist.

I don’t want to be a democrat so I can fit in with my generation and I don’t want to be a republican just to beat the drum of sanctity of life.

I don’t want to read one more angry Christian book that tears the church up and down; just to prove that I think the church is a waste and out-dated like other 20-somethings.

I want to be a Christian. A Christ-follower. A disciple that follows in his steps.

I want to be relevant and current, communicating the Gospel in a way that makes sense to those around me.

I want to walk by that homeless man, woman, family and have my heart tugged with a heaviness because of the pain in this world. And instead of tossing change in the hand of the man I did not make eye contact with, I want to be a part of finding the fundamental problem and the fundamental solution. I want to be proactive and look to develop ways to empower change, not just relieve symptoms.

I want to spend time with my Hindu, Buddhist, Muslim, and Mormon friends because they are human beings. I want to appreciate the beauty of their culture and the differences between our faiths. I want to stop diluting Christianity and every other religion by saying we are all the same, because the fact is, it is in the differences that the beauty of God is magnified as we find that His word is transcendent of all cultures, beliefs, and ages. It is through Christ that we can have a diverse community.

I want to be someone who can love and seek to know deeper the heart of all people. In doing this, I will not be a racist, a sexist, a religionist, or have any form of hate inside of me towards humans. I will naturally be someone who desires to not be judgmental but always wants to understand a little better. I can share my values and beliefs, without fear of others “finding me out” and lumping me in the “stereotypical Christian”category. I don’t need to fight against a stereotype of “Christians”=judgmental and non-accepting if I am filled with love for all. I can spend that energy fighting for a culture that sees every human worthy of the message of Christ. I don’t have to avoid the subject of religion or spirituality, because it is who I am…it seeps out of my pores…I do not want to put my personal, spiritual, and professional life in separate categories….

I want to be knowledgeable about politics, enough to know where passion and energy is needed to effect social change. Why are social justice issues a “democrat” or “republican” issue? They should be a Christ-follower issue. Some things should not be clouded by party lines. Life is one of those issues: the right for each human to have life.

I want to be an agent of change who is passionate about doing more than voting. I want to sacrifice time and energy to contribute tirelessly to the great social injustice of abortion, domestic violence, lack of housing, food, and medical services for the poor, human sex trafficking, etc. I want to advocate for all life and be a voice for those whose lives are being taken.

I want to see the Church the way God sees it, the way Christ and the disciples spoke of it. I don’t want to be a prophetess protesting the soon-coming doomsday of the church. I want to be a loyal and active part of a community that has the potential and power to transform an entire community and society. We treat her like she is beaten and bruised, no hope of ever being the radiant bride God said she was. I want to be apart of a community that believes in being something larger then “self.” I want to be the one that looks back on the past 2000 years and boldly proclaim that true Christians have always been a part of every social injustice ending and are called to continue to be a part of seeing injustice and evil pushed down.

I am growing weary of a sea of Christians trying to make a point. What if we just decide to love people? And love people by loving God and knowing God and obeying His word. That is who I want to be.

My Goal

2007-10-06T23:10:00.000-07:00

My goal is God Himself, not joy nor peace;
Nor even blessing, but Himself, my God.
'Tis His to lead me there, not mine but His...
At any cost, dear Lord, by any road.
So faith bounds forward to its goal in God,
and love can trust her Lord to lead her there.
Upheld by Him, my soul is foll'wing hard,
Till God hath full fulfilled my deepest prayer.

No matter if the way be sometimes dark,
No matter though the cost be oft-times great,
He knoweth how I best shall reach the mark,
The way that leads to Him must needs be straight.

One thing I know, I cannot say Him nay;
One thing I do, I press on towards my Lord.
My God, my Glory here from day to day,
And in the glory there, my Great Reward.

-by Fredrick Brook

Back to the real world... :)

2007-09-03T10:51:00.000-07:00

We are back from our honeymoon! We had an AMAZING time in Honduras. We spent the first week on a beautiful island off the coast of Honduras and the second week up in the rain forest on the main land. We met so many special people, visited beautiful villages, ate great food, and enjoyed every second together. Our time was so special. Thank you all for your prayers. It is hard to just pick a few pictures to share...

Thank you all for your support in our marriage. We were overwhelmed by how much God has blessed us with friends and family that love us so much and give so much of themselves to us.

thoughts T minus 18 days :)

2007-07-22T22:54:00.001-07:00

I thought you would all enjoy seeing some pictures my sister took of us last weekend.

I cannot believe I am getting married in 18 days. Wild! Seriously. God is so good. I am just blessed beyond words to be marrying Vermon. It is amazing to be able to feel and know the love of God in such a tangible way through another human being. It is also such a gift to be able to offer complete, unconditional love to someone. I truly believe that this is a gift only God can grant. In our own power, we cannot be so self-emptying and self-giving, but through God's rich grace we can follow in the steps of Christ and serve and love one another, putting their interests far above our own. When two people do this in marriage, I believe it reflects the beauty and image of God in such an intense and pure way.

Anyway, I wanted to share some sermons about marriage and singleness to bless and encourage you. The first set are from Vermon's sermon series on sex, singlness, & marriage and the second set are from Pastor Tim from Camelback Bible Church (he did our premarital counseling). All of these messages grew and stretched our relationship in so many ways. Enjoy! :)

Vermon's series:
Christ Centered Relationships: Marriage
Christ Centered Relationships: Singleness and Dating
Christ Centered Relationships: Love and Sex

Pastor Tim:
UNITING THE GENDERS, PART I - The Mystery of Two Becoming One - Genesis 2:24-25
UNITING THE GENDERS, PART II - The Secret Power of Love - John 17:20-26
UNITING THE GENDERS, PART III - The Holy Combustion of Physical Union - 1Cor. 6:12-20, Prov. 5:15-20, Song of Songs
UNITING THE GENDERS, PART IV - Signposts for Men and Women - Assorted Biblical Texts

Red Sox Fever

2007-06-10T13:42:00.001-07:00

This isn't going to be one of my deeper/challenging posts...just a random observation...

Last night was such an interesting experience. I was sitting at a Red Sox vs. Diamondbacks game in Phoenix Arizona with Vermon and 20+ of my closest family members (some of which flew from new england to watch the 3 game inter-leauge series). You NEVER would have known we were in Phoenix. 9.5 out of 10 people were wearing Red Sox paraphernalia (the other 5% was a mix of D-backs stuff and Yankees stuff). When the jumbo trons came on, trying to rally the croud to root, "D-back" the crowd burst out in a wave of "Red Sox"...when the D-backs got a good call, boos...when the red sox made a good play...Case Field erupted in cheers.

I think the high light of the night was when some Red Sox fans who had one (or 4) too many $6 beers started cheering, "Yankees Suck" (I think chanting that phrase over and over was more fun for my 8 and 10 year old cousins then the Red Sox actually playing!) I couldn't help but feel bad for the D-backs...getting booed while on their home field. But not too bad to not enjoy the Red Sox win in overtime.

Okay...honestly, I didn't care at all about the game. Vermon and I just went to be with everyone. It was so exciting to be a part of my younger cousins excitement...and memories. They were in New England Heaven. I spent much more time watching them cheer, hoot, hollar, and laugh then I did watch the game (although, I did see the great play that tied the game...pretty exciting :)).

This is an obvious parallel...but it is remarkable to me that millions of men can be so passionate about sports...to the point of tearing when their team wins the World Series, Super Bowl, etc...to the point of HATING or disdaining a team like the Yankees...yet these same men struggle with their passion for God and even more so for people. I don't get it. It is interesting that people can get so excited about something that does nothing for humanity and means nothing in light of eternity, yet feel no conviction about their belief in God meaning nothing in their every day life.

(Disclaimer: not saying there is anything wrong about loving a team...as long as they aren't the Yankees ;))

Getting a Biblical Perspective on Social Status

2007-05-26T21:42:00.000-07:00

Due to being out of town, childrens church, and nursery...I was a little behind on my favorite pastor's sermons (great theology, great passion, and very attractive...you can't get a better combination from a pastor ;) )

Anyway...Vermon's James series has been so good (in my completely unbiased opinion). I just listened to this sermon on James 1: 9-11.

I HIGHLY encourage you to listen:

Getting a Biblical Perspective on Social Status

her name is "mommy"

2007-05-26T18:54:00.000-07:00

I really have the best job in the entire world… I feel like I am doing it injustice by even calling it a job…finally, I get paid to just be Dennae. :) I really would work at Sojourner Center for free (shh…don’t tell anyone, the pay is kinda helpful for paying bills!) Often, I get in my car after a long, exhausting, draining day and I pause before turning the key. In that pause, I just get this big smile on my face as my mind is flooded with all the precious moments I had that day and great life lessons I learned. There is something about working with hurting children that constantly reminds me of the simplicity of life and the value of love, touch, and belonging. I feel like I have, in many ways, learned more from my kids that I work with then I have taught them.

One of those learning moments happened right before I left for the long weekend on Thursday. I was walking around the center when I found a wandering kid running around in the grass. I asked the four-year-old if I could hold his hand and walk with him back to his room and I said, “I am going to go find your mom, what is her name?” He looked at me and said, “her name is mommy.” I smiled. “Yes, I know, but what do other people call her?” He got a puzzled look on his face and said, “her name is mommy.” I knelt down on his level, so I could be face to face with him, and tried again, “friend, I know you call her mommy, but what about people who aren’t hers, what do they call her?” “mommy.” Hmm…this line of questioning wasn’t working, so I took a different route. “what does she look like?” “She looks like my mommy.” I had to hold in the laughter. “what color hair does she have?” He paused, looked like he was thinking, and with complete sincerity said, “the same color hair all mommies have.” At that point I just decided that I loved this child’s heart and decided to play with him until she came back to the room.

Sometimes I feel like I approach God in that way. I can take the complex, mysterious, awe-inspiring God…and in a few short breaths, simply reduce him to a three letter word, void of meaning and emotion. To a child, “mommy”= “my mother”; to an adult, “mommy” = “billions of women all over the world.”

To me, “God”= my creator, my passion, my love; the one who has rescued me, through Christ, from a life of meaningless existence where the world revolved around me and brought me to a life of purposeful mission where the world revolves around God and his good, justice, grace, and mercy. To the world, “God”= whatever you want him to be.

I think this is why that street corner “preacher” on Mill avenue that says, “repent you evil sinners, the end is near and you are going to burn in hell” really gets my blood pumping. I imagine a person walking up to him and saying, “Who is it that we are supposed to repent to?” The “preacher” looks at him with a “your stupid” look and says, “God.” “Ya, but who is God?” “duh, God is god.” “Okay, I understand that, but who is this God you speak of?” “He is God.”

How quickly that conversation would grow old and annoying. I feel like too often, we approach God as though he were the same as every other “god” in the universe. There is more to “God” then five minute evangelistic tactic could ever present. Are there times where we are given only a five minute opportunity to really share with someone who Jesus is and how he has totally changed our hearts, our passions, our lives? Absolutely. But should that be the majority of times we are talking about who this God is? Absolutely not.

If I believe God to be all that he says he is then my thoughts, my reading, my conversations, my relationships, my time should be consumed with Him. It should be evident in every moment of my life that I am on a life-long quest to intimately know my God and act in a way that reflects His goodness and kindness. I need to have more words in my vocabulary to describe Him then simply, “God.” So much so, that I can spend not just five minutes, but hours and days explaining, describing, and articulating who He is, what He looks like, and what He cares about.

happiness is just a curly fry away...

2007-04-22T14:03:00.000-07:00

Vermon and I spent the day yesterday walking along a beautiful beach by my aunt and uncle’s house in sunny southern California. I was struck all throughout our walk by God’s majesty and beauty. Nature has a way of making me stop, swallow that lump in my throat, and stand in awe of God. This weekend has been nothing but one happy moment after another, which is why I found this so amusing…at the end of our walk, Vermon and I came across this empty soda cup that said:

“Happiness is just a curly fry away.”

Interesting statement. I kind of smiled as I pointed it out to Vermon, “This would be the winner if our culture could be defined by a soda cup…” I joked. At that moment it seemed funny, but as I reflect on it, I do not know how far I was from the truth.

Americans…maybe just humans in general, pine for a life of happiness. It is even valued as high of a right as life and liberty! Think about what that means? Should the pursuit of happiness be a human right and if so, should it be equal to life and liberty?

And…just like everything else, we don’t want that pursuit to be a hard, toilsome work. Put it in the microwave, set it to high…instant happiness. It is “just” a moment away…quick, pull over, buy these curly fries and you will be happy.

You fill in the blank. Happiness is just a soul mate away. Happiness is just a dream house away. Happiness is just an adventure away. Happiness is just a satisfying job away. Happiness is just a __________ away.

The more we pursue happiness the less happy our world gets. It is in pursuing our own agendas and desires that we become more evil. We were created to serve. We should be pursuing a life of constant sacrificial, self-emptying service to God and others. What if the Decleration of Independence read, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the right to live a life of constant, Christ-like service to God and each other.”

It is in service, many times a tiring, exhausting act, where we will find the deepest satisfaction and happiness ever known. There is nothing instant about it. You can’t pull over the moment you get a craving, whip out a $5 bill and purchase it. Living a life of constant, selfless service is work, hard work. But it is a work that will lead to endless and limitless rewards.

One of the most incredible lessons I have begun to learn through my relationship with Vermon is that happiness is simply a side benefit. Marrying him because he makes me happy would destroy us, because it moves the epicenter of our marriage from Christ to us and our desires. If I walk forward in marrying him simply based on my happiness, then I am missing the entire reason God created marriage.

God created marriage to express himself and to glorify his name. In marrying Vermon, I am given the gift of being able to reflect the image of God to him and him to me. And the image of God is shown in his son, Jesus Christ, who gave himself as a sacrifice for us. How beautiful. It is beautiful that our love will only be as deep as we are able to reflect Christ to each other. It is only in self-emptying, sacrificial love and service to each other that we be able to fulfill the purpose that God intended for marriage.

Of course, if we both strive to, by God’s grace, do that…we will know an indescribable amount of happiness. What I value more then happiness is the deep, divine-like love that I have received from Vermon. The moments in life that I have pursued happiness do not compare to the moments where I have been able to love and serve Vermon in ways that are not normal or natural…and times when I have received acts of service from him that are far from what I deserve. We cannot afford to pursue happiness. Happiness is not the chief end of man.

The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him fully.

God, help me to pursue that.

A Culture of Violence

2007-03-07T19:13:00.000-08:00

There are certain topics that get me very fired up. I know my friends and family think I am extreme and hate television. I do not hate television, I hate the amount of time it takes away from people’s lives. I hate what it does to families, children, and our culture. I know this is lengthy and most of you are sick of hearing about it from me...so only read this entire thing if you really love me. :) (just kidding!)

I think entertainment is a great thing. Unfortunately, I think our society approaches entertainment just like they approach the rest of life: entertainment=consumption. That one word “consume” sums up the purpose of entertainment in the lives of many. We cheapen our lives when we limit our definition of entertainment to, “a painless activity that gratifies and satisfies me.” There is so much more to entertainment.

Entertainment is simply occupying your mind with something enjoyable, amusing, or even pleasurable. In a dark world filled with evil, we need space in our life and our minds to enjoy the earth that God has given us. Entertainment can be playing with children, drinking coffee with friends, fellowship with community, sitting around a campfire, hiking through the Adirondacks, reading a great book...anything that glorifies God and allows us to enjoy him more can be entertainment (by that definition, I have no problem with any media that does that).

It is interesting when I begin to explain my views on media, that people automatically jump to the conclusion that I am extreme and find no value in entertainment. I think this just sheds light on the fact that their definition of entertainment is narrow. This post was inspired by a recent 24 episode I watched. Trying to prove that I was not an enemy of television, I decided to pick a show to watch that Vermon is watching. I thought it would be a fun compromise, since he often does things with me that I know he never thought of doing pre-dennae. I had watched every episode this season, until a week ago, when I felt the violence really crossed the line.

Now, I do think that violence is okay to portray through art, music, movies, etc. I think it should be done in a way that draws people towards a resolution. It needs to be something that sickens and outrages people at the evil in this world and compels and pushes them forward toward being a vanguard of social change. I think there is something wrong when violence is nothing more then, “a painless activity that gratifies and satisfies me.”

The argument has been made, “just because I watch a violent show does not mean I am going to be more violent.” I agree. It does not mean that. Just because I watch a movie with graphic sexual content, does not mean I am going to have premarital sex. The point I am trying to make is not how you, personally, are effected by meaningless acts of violence. Jack Bauer killed a terrorist. The writer of the show could have portrayed it in a way where it gave the audience a healthy sense of justice. But instead, men and women all across America thought or said, “ooohh…Jack is so awesome!” as he brutally an inhumanely killed a man in a five minute killing scene that ended with the terrorist’s neck snapping as his body hung from a metal chain. And our society doesn’t even flinch when it's over and spends the next day at the water cooler talking about the great episode.

The fact is violence is real. I work with women and children all day, every day that have lived a reality that is the entertainment of so many. I have kids that have seen bodies hang from beams just like that scene that millions watched for pure entertainment. Bloody, beaten bodies is not out of the norm for some of my six, seven, and eight year old children, but it also is not entertainment to them. It is a frightening nightmare that they don’t know if they will survive. I am not being dramatic, I am not being extreme, I am being honest. We live in a violent and disgusting world in which evil triumphs when good men sit idle.

If you think that this is my soapbox just because I am around it all day, then I challenge you to move your life to a place where you can see the world for what it really is. You don't have to be around hungry people to be passionate about feeding the hungry and not wasting food. You don't have to be around illiterate families to be passionate about educating children. You don't have to be around alcoholics or drug attics, marriages that are dissolving, oppressed women, slaves, families breaking because of debt, races being wiped out by genocide, or children who are abused to be passionate about seeing those social ills resolved.

Our lives need to be a little more black and white if we want to start to see change happen. Deciding not to endorse meaningless violence on television is not about legalism, it is about being sick and tired of a society and culture that embraces a culture of violence.

I believe that there are hundreds, maybe thousands of social ills that could be alleviated if Christians would reject the definition of entertainment as, “a painless activity that gratifies and satisfies me" and make entertainment a very small part of their life instead of the focus. If you are still reading (then you get 100 extra points and must be a REALLY good and dear friend of mine! :) ) Take some time to read these stats: http://www.mediafamily.org/facts/facts_vlent.shtml In my experience, people don’t really care about stats because all they care about is that they are not affected by it, but my challenge is to stop thinking about yourself and how you are effected and start thinking about society and culture as a whole and take a stand against violence.

the proposal... =)

2007-01-16T10:06:00.000-08:00

I already talked to most of you who read this, but I wanted to share some pictures with you! Thanks to Vermon's sister and my sister's willingness to hide in the bushes and take pictures...we were able to get some special moments on camera. ;)

conviction...

2006-12-04T17:23:00.001-08:00

It is so easy to wander through life, not noticing the great blessings God has bestowed upon us. For example, If I flip the switch on and get light several times a day, every day, for 22 years, then I very rarely think to stop and thank God for light. When I go a month or longer without electricty, I begin to praise God every time I flip that switch and light enters the room.

I would like to compare that thought to how blessed I am to have a Bible and the ability to study it.

According to UNESCO, in the world today there are about 1 billion non-literate adults.

This 1 billion is approximately 26 percent of the world's adult population.
Women make up two-thirds of all non-literates.
98 percent of all non-literates live in developing countries.
In the least developed countries, the overall illiteracy rate is 49 percent.
52 percent of all non-literates live in India and China.
Africa as a continent has a literacy rate of less than 60 percent.
In Sub-Saharan Africa since 1980, primary school enrollment has declined, going from 58 percent to 50 percent.
In all developing countries, the percentage of children aged 6-11 not attending school is 15 percent. In the least developed countries, it is 45 percent.(UNESCO 1998)

Combine that with these facts:

Of the 2,400 language groups with portions of the Bible, roughly 1,115 have the New Testament.
Only 426 have a full Bible, including the Old Testament
(If I am reading these stats right) that means, of 2,400 languages (that HAVE portions of the Bible, this does not include language groups that do not have portions of the Bible!), 53% do not have bibles translated into their language, only 46% have the New Testament, and only 17% have both old and new testament translated into their language (that means 83% of the world’s languages that have a portion of the Bible do not have the entire Bible translation).

The fact is…if I was born in any third-world country, the chances are that I would be highly unlikely to pick up a Bible and start reading it. Even worse, if I was born into one of those people groups without a Bible…I couldn’t even have someone in my community that does read, read it to me.

But the possibility of not having access to read God’s word is not secluded to third world countries. I interact with people every day…right here in America…who cannot read. I have met a few who cannot even write their own name. They aren’t stupid and they don’t have learning disabilities…they were just born into violent, abusive, and neglectful families that never sent them to school.

But I walk by 4 bibles and many shelves of books filled with books explaining passages of scripture every single day. I live in a country with over a hundred evangelical bible colleges, universities, and seminaries. There are hundreds of sound theologians that are publishing books faster then I will ever be able to read that exegete and expound on scripture. I could sign up to study Greek and Hebrew and study God’s word for myself in the original language.

Failure to study God’s word is more then a lack of discipline in my life, it is foolish and sinful. It should be as repulsive as a nation starving to death while there is enough food for a daily thanksgiving day feast sitting in storage.

To go throughout my life without studying God’s word on a consistent and continual basis, is like going through life with a million dollars in my bank account, yet sleeping in Central Park in the middle of the winter. It would be stupid, and yet…when I stood before God, I feel like that would make more sense then trying to account for why I was not immersed in this great gift that God has given me while so much of the world has lived without it.

Sunday Reflections...

2006-11-19T16:53:00.000-08:00

I came to church this morning feeling a little drained, but the songs and the message cut to my heart as we talked about God’s promises and God’s will. I want to cling to the promises that God has given us in His word. God promises to redeem this earth and redeem his children. I want to look at this world and be moved (to action) with compassion like Christ was, not distracted and apathetic at all the chaotic mess.

This is the first week since I began my job that I was counting down the days for my weekend to begin. I was feeling discouraged the past few days as I encounter so many people who are living devastating, destructive lives...not just at work, but everywhere I look. I am surrounded by many people who are living in a man-made hell on earth. As I look at all the hurt, pain, and suffering in everyone’s life, sometimes I feel so weighed down. I only personally know the human suffering of a small handful in comparison with the billions of people that walk this earth. That thought is overwhelming, but at the same time makes me want to fall on my face and worship my God.

I cannot believe that I follow a God that sympathizes with the pain and suffering of humanity and desires to redeem it…not only does God desire to see us walking in unity with Him, but he gave his son, to die for our sins, that we may have the hope of living a life in unity with God’s heart, desires, and passions.

Vermon read Ephesians 3:20 this morning and it struck my heart in such a special way, “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”

If I, a human, a sinner, can ask and think of the worst of situations to be made whole and complete in Christ, then how much greater is God’s desire to do that for humanity? It is incomparable. I serve a God that is ABLE TO DO far more ABUNDANTLY than all that I ask or think. ..ABLE…TO DO…FAR MORE…ABUNDANTLY…ALL…that I ASK…OR THINK… I am truly in awe of God when I think of this. How can I be discouraged when I think about God’s great heart of love, compassion, justice, and righteousness?

Just wanted to share the words of some songs we sang today that really touched my heart.

The first one touched me because I feel like I can easily get lost in trying to understand what God has willed and planned. When I can freely admit that I am not skilled to undertand those things, I am freed to look at what I do know…I know that at God’s right hand is my Savior.

The second song touched me because I do not want to ever claim freedom from sorrow, pain, or care, I only want to glorify God’s name. The same goes for this world. The deepest fulfillment and joy comes not in freedom from pain, but in glorifying God’s name and to steal John Piper’s famous quote, “God is most glorified in us, when we are most satisfied in him” (and being satisfied in God, will one day lead us to eternity freed from pain and suffering and a present life filled with a role in GOd's mission to redeem all of humanity from the death that sin has trapped us in.

My Savior, My God

I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned
I only know at his right hand
Stands one who is my savior

I take him at his word and deed
Christ died to save me this I read
And in my heart I find a need
For him to be my savior

That he would leave his place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my savior

My savior loves, my savior lives
My savior's always there for me
My God he was, my God he is
My God he's always gonna be

Yes, living, dying; let me bring
My strength, my solace from this spring
That he who lives to be my king
Once died to be my savior

Be Glorified

Not from sorrow, pain, or care
Freedom dare I claim
This alone shall be my prayer
Glorify thy name

Be glorified in me
Be glorified
Be glorified in me
Be glorified

Can I child presume to choose
where or how to live?
Can a father's love refuse
all the best to give?

Let my glad heart while it sings
Thee in all proclaim
And whatever future brings
Glorify thy name

Romans 8:18-25
“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to decay and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.”

"The Cost of Discipleship" by Dietrich Bonhoeffer

2006-11-10T06:55:00.000-08:00

For all of you who wanted to participate in the book discussion...here is the link:

http://christianbookdiscussion.blogspot.com/

Matthew 10:16-24

2006-10-03T10:46:00.000-07:00

I love reading the Gospels. I love seeing the heart of Christ and thinking about the life he is calling us to. I read this passage of scripture a few days ago and have been chewing on it for a while...

Matthew 10: 16-23 "Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Beware of men, for they will deliver you over to courts and flog you in their synagogues, and you will be dragged before governors and kings for my sake, to bear witness before them and the Gentiles. When they deliver you over, do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you in that hour. For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death, and you will be hated by all for my name's sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. When they persecute you in one town, flee to the next, for truly, I say to you, you will not have gone through all the towns of Israel before the Son of Man comes."

Jesus tells his disciples that they will be flogged, persecuted, and hated for His name sake. The same God that called for such selfless sacrifice to the point of pain, torture, and death is the same God that calls for disciples to follow Him today.

It makes me wonder why the invitation to follow Christ is often portrayed as an inviation to a life filled with happiness and smooth sailing. Why do we often depict relationship with Christ as this simple, brainless, easy choice? When I think about Christ sharing this with his followers, I do not imagine them thinking this future sounded like the "married with 2 kids, a dog, and a white-picket fence" life they maybe had aspirations for.

Is following Christ an easy choice? It makes so much sense for me. I could write for pages why it makes sense, but it definitely has not been a choice that has always led to the easiest path. And it definitely hasn't been the path of smooth sailing, unending bliss, and constant happiness. It has been a while since I have seen the movie, so my analogy may be a little hazy, but a scene in Patriot comes to mind as I think about this. There is a scene where there are all these people sitting on the side of a hill, under the cool shade of a tree, watching the battle unfold before them. Contrast that to the soldiers fighting, shedding their blood, giving their life for a cause they are passionate about. That is what the Christian life should be more described as. Given the choice to chose between being a part of something that will change history, see justice served, people healed, and lives changed...or to sit on the sidelines...that is an easy choice for me...but the actions are not easy and there will be consequences, wounds, and sacrifices. It would be much easier for my physically body to sit and watch. I would never have to get my heart rate up, I would never have to risk pain or hurt, I would never have to worry about the blood of others splattering on me and getting me messy and dirty. It would be easier to not be a part of it, to not participate...but it would not be the life I would rather live. Christianity is too often depicted as being an audience at a symphony. We can sit together and enjoy the beautiful music, bask in the artist’s work, enjoy the sounds as we sit and listen. Our intended purpose being to take part in producing the song instead becomes the passive enjoyment of a spectator. Unfortunately, the closest many get to taking part of God’s work is in sharp critiques and criticisms of the players, another passive approach to a life where God demands anything but passivity.

We talk about longing for community, but when you get to the heart of what we really want, it isn't for a group of people to get dirty with, to fight with, to pour out our sweat, blood, and tears with, to sacrifice our life for...it is for a group to sit, sip fine wine, and enjoy life with. What kind of Christianity are we offering the world? What kind of salvation are we offering if we are not offering a salvation for the empty, fruitless life they are living right now? Do we really believe following Christ to be something that is worth throwing our entire life into? Our entire family into? Our entire body and mind into? Are we offering the world an invitation to just sit, listen, and enjoy with us? Or are we offering them an opportunity to be a part of something so much greater then sitting on the sidelines or in the stands?

illegal to feed homeless???

2006-08-22T11:33:00.000-07:00

what do you think of this article?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14168471/

I read in several other articles that the penalty for feeding homeless in Las Vegas Parks is up to 6 months in jail and a $1000 fine.

My first question is what is the motive in passing this law? Honestly, the cynic in me wants to say these politicians just want to clean up their parks and make them look better...but there is a possibility that they are trying to help the homeless.

The mayor stated that, "What we're trying to do is get the homeless to be fed in a social service environment, within a faith based environment, where there's a social worker, a doctor that puts them on meds, you get them back into society, instead of feeding them and running and leaving them there,"

That sounds great in theory. But the fact is...the United States is filled with chronic homeless people and it is not because churches and Salvation Army's go down there on Saturday mornings and give them break fast. The more I work with the homeless population, the more I realize that there is always going to be a percentage that will never come and use our non-profit, faith based, or government services. I work with youth from 9-21 that are living on the streets. We have many in that age group that are not allowed to use our services for various reasons. I have met homeless youth that have burned their bridges at all the social service programs and youth that have no desire to come in and set up goals and work with case managers. We absolutely need to equip the homeless to help themselves. We need to teach them and help them get off the streets, but what do we do with the percentage that are too mentally ill or too fried on drugs to come into those centers? It is wrong to just feed them and leave them there to be homeless, but it is childish and naive to think that every single homeless person is ready to break away from that life and come, get on meds, and get back into society. We cannot help people that do not want to help themselves, but we can still offer them the basic necessities. What is our duty as a Christian to meet immediate needs as well as long-term? Are we called to only feed those that are hungry if they want to be integrated back into society?

When I read the Mayor's defense I suddenly had images flash through my head of Christians and churches defending this law because it sounds so good. I pray I am wrong. Are we called to only show compassion and kindness to the non-drug attics, the non-lazy, the ones that are desperately trying to get off the streets? No, we are called to meet the needs of those around us...regardless of what their mental state is. I think the church needs to be strategic in how they do that. There probably are too many churches doing feeds on Saturday mornings and then just leaving it at that...there needs to be a balance between meeting immediate needs and deliberately planning long-term ways to help those who are poor get out of their situation.

To think that I could be sitting in a park, hand out some granola bars and juice to a homeless man, and end up having to spend 6 months in jail or pay a $1000 fine is ridiculous. To think that a local church cannot go to their neighborhood park and hand out water bottles on a hot summer day is sickening. I pray the Christian community of Las Vegas passionately gets involved in this. The government of Las Vegas may be trying to help the homeless find more long-term help, but in reality what they are doing is trying to strip away the human right to show compassion and kindness.

From Brokenness to Community

2006-07-26T08:14:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading, “From Brokenness to Community” by Jean Vanier. The book was originated from two lectures given by Jean Vanier at Harvard University. It is a very short book, but very thought provoking and challenging. I recommend it to everyone (especially you Rhode Islanders ;)) Here is an excerpt from the book:

“We continually need to have before us the challenge of our mission. We are not in a community just to protect ourselves. We are not even there just to protect our own little spiritual lives. We’re there for the church, for people in pain. We have a message to give, and we have a message to receive. We have a mission, and if we are not a people of mission, then the community is in danger of closing up, and of dying.
Of course for Christians, the greatest becoming is entering into a deeper and more intimate relationship with Christ. It is, finally, a mystical union with God. Perhaps this is the heart of the message of every religion, but it is very much the heart of the Christ. We are called to be a people of freedom because we have received the Holy Spirit, and Jesus is our friend leading us to communion with the father.
Thus community is not an end or a final goal in itself. It is the place where we can meet Christ and discover his love for humanity and for every person. Martin Buber said that the community is the place of the theophany. It is the place where we meet God in a very intimate relationship, where we can have that experience of being “seized by Christ.” God loves us and draws us into the mystery and the love of the Trinity; there we can rest in his love. But community only keeps its meaning if it remains open to mission.”

Ending Hunger Now

2006-07-13T22:45:00.000-07:00

I started reading a book tonight called, “Ending Hunger Now” Well…its now 3am in the morning (which…a book has to be pretty good for me to stay up this late) and I just finished it. I really recommend this.

The book is filled with a lot of statistics and facts. Hard facts about hunger that I did not realize. I was going to flip through the pages I earmarked and highlighted so I could post some quotes, but there are just too many good things to chose from. I think that the authors are definitely stretching it with some of their ideas and conclusions, but the concept is great…that it is very possible to cut world hunger in half within the next decade.

I am so tempted to type out a bunch of horrific statistics right now…but we have heard them before. At some point in the book, one of the authors quoted an African woman who says, “Statistic are numbers without tears.”

Hunger is becoming a buzzword in our Christian culture. Caring about famine and disease in Africa, China, and India is becoming very popular. We quote the statistics and discuss global justice. Phrases like “human rights” and “global justice” are being tossed around in our vocabulary. However, ten, fifteen, twenty years from now, I wonder if there will be change? I wonder if our hearts and minds are really grasping this tragic world-crisis and if we are willing to meet this great need.

This book was written for churches to go through as a study and discussion guide. The title sums up the main idea of the book…there is enough food in the world to end hunger now. Accepting that fact really means a life-change for many Americans. If that is the truth, then something drastic has to change for the middle-class and wealthy American. We can’t blame it on God for allowing drought and famine and natural disasters. Famine only accounts for 3% of reasons why people are starving. We can only blame it our disobedience to God. On our sin.

I really want to resist the concept of caring about the poor for popularity and trend sake and really be moved with compassion and move in action toward helping the poor out of a deep obedience to God and a deep understanding of his heart and motives. I am so glad that human rights and global justice is something that the younger generations seem to be talking a lot about, but talk is not going to put food in the stomachs of the hungry. Only action and obedience to what God has commanded us to do will begin to reduce the population of the 850 million people who are going to bed with very empty stomachs.

One of the frustrations I had with this book is that it focuses mainly on policy change and little on how the church can really make a dent in reducing the number of the hungry. I would have liked to have read more practical ideas as to what the church can do as a body to reduce the large number of hungry, but at least it is a short/quick read that can get the community talking…I just hope the result of the talking leads to some sort of creative ideas and action.

What are your thoughts? Please comment… :)

Only Love Remains

2006-06-13T23:39:00.000-07:00

I came across this song about a week ago and I have just been listening to it over and over...I typed out the words too, because they are SO powerful, but you can listen to the song here: http://www.myspace.com/jjhellermusic

Only Love Remains
by J.J. Heller

Scenes of you come rushing through
You are breaking me down
So break me into pieces that will grow in the ground
I know that I deserve to die for the murder in my heart
So be gentle with me Jesus as you tear me apart

Please kill the liar, kill the thief in my
You know that I am tired of their cruelty
Breath into my spirit, Breath into my veins
Until only love remains…

You burn away the ropes that bind and hold me to the earth
The fire only leaves behind whatever is of worth
I begin to see reality for the first time in my life
I know I am a shadow, but I am dancing in Your light

Teach me to be humble, call me from the grave
Show me how to walk with you upon the waves
Breath into my spirit, Breath into my veins Until only love remains…

pictures from alaska...

2006-06-11T17:25:00.000-07:00

culture shock?

2006-06-10T17:46:00.000-07:00

The question I keep getting asked by everyone is, "Are you experiencing culture shock coming back to the states?"

For the past few weeks I have been answering, "no." In some ways, I was prepared to re-enter my world here. I was looking forward to seeing friends and catching up on life. It was so hard to leave, but I was excited to come home too. It was very bitter-sweet getting back on the plane.

The other question I keep getting asked is, "Is it hard to be back." Up until a few days ago, it hasn't been. But the past few days I have really just been missing my life in Tanzania. I miss the boys so much. I miss the incredible friends that I left behind. I miss working with my team. I miss the pace of life, the culture, hearing swahili, running through the bananna fields, the crazy driving, going into different villages and playing with kids, laying in the grass talking with the Emmanuel Center boys and hearing their laughs, rocking on the swing on the front porch and watching the sun set, the hard rains. I even miss the mud, not knowing if their was going to be electricity when I flipped the switch, not knowing when my next shower might be...

As I sit down to "catch up" with friends and family, I don't know where to begin when talking about my time and experience there. And I don't want to be one of those annoying people that went on a missions trip once and suddenly every story she tells comes back to, "when I was in..."

I am very happy to be home. I see Phoenix with fresh eyes and I have a renewed passion to pour love into the lives of those who need it here. I know that my steps are ordered by God and he has me here, in this moment, for a divine purpose. But God opened up a well of emotions within me while I was in Africa that I didn't know existed and anytime God does that in my life it is always to move me towards action. I guess that is the question right now, what do I do with everything the Lord spoke to me and taught me these last five months?

I talked to my friend John yesterday, he was there with me my entire time. He described his emotions of being home as feeling "restless." Maybe that is a better way to explain how I am feeling. The "restless" feeling doesn't necessarily mean I am packing my bags and going back, but it does mean that God is doing something within me that will require action and change.

one year older...

2006-06-05T07:44:00.000-07:00

I said I would never do it, but I did it. I always said only old people wore them and I always wanted to be young at heart, but I am wearing one as I type. Confession...I bought my first watch last week.

I have had them given to me as gifts before, but I have never really gotten in the habbit of wearing one. I remember when I was a kid watching my grandpa take his gold pocket watch out of his coat and checking the time and ever since then I always thought that watches were something grown-ups wore. I remember wanting a watch thinking it would mark me as an "adult" but by the time I was old enough to actually wear one, I think they were out of style. So, up until now, I have claimed that watches were for old people. I have always felt like watches were symbols of being in a hurry, just watching life pass you by. I am not someone who is late to everything, I admit that time is important, but something about actually wearing a watch, constantly looking down to check the time...it has just been something I never wanted to do.

So purchasing and wearing a watch all week was a strange experience. I kind of felt like I was looking in the mirror and finding a few grey hairs or something. I told a friend of mine that is in her 30's that I just don't feel like a grown up...she said she didn't either. So I tried talking to my friend in his 40's...he agreed, at 40, he still felt like he had so much growing to do. My dad is 50...he still feels young, my grandpa is...I don't know how old, but he is younger at heart then I am sometimes. It was just a weird moment to look down at the time and realize, that I was doing just that...watching time tick by and that I really am getting older. (I know this probably sounds a little melodramatic, especially considering how young most of you think I am! ha ha..)

This past year has gone by in lightning speed, yet each moment I feel like I have been able to savor. There were so many times last week, as I stood in the middle of God's breath-taking, incredible creation, that I felt like time stood still. It was as if life was on pause and all that mattered was God's glory and creative heart. But even in those moments where life was on pause for me, I had a greater revelation that time was moving full force and many lives were feeling controlled and abused by it. That all that really does matter is God's glory and heart, but I am surrounded by a world that doesn't really understand or know that. It doesn't matter how slow or fast I feel time may be ticking away, the fact is that time is always in constant motion and there really is so little time to reach the hearts of a hopeless world. I just want to live my life with an urgancy...no matter how young or old I am.

All that being said, I guess the watch has a new symbolic meaning to me...instead of being something that seems to controll life, it is now just a subtle reminder that I am here for a purpose and I need to surrender each moment of my life into God's hands and use it to love him and this world...

"Time is too slow for those who wait

too swift for those who fear

too long for those who grieve,

too short for those who rejoice,

but for those who love, time is eternity.

Hours fly, flowers die,

new days, new ways pass by,

Love stays."

~Henry Van Dyke

home sweet home...

2006-05-20T10:38:00.000-07:00

I am back in Arizona. My cousin, Allison, was home for a few weeks visiting, but she was flying back to Mexico a few hours before I flew into Phoenix, so I was not going to be able to see her. So I was able to fly in early and showed up at Starbucks last night to surprise my two girls. :) Our time was too short and went by too fast, but we sat around and shared stories, laughed, prayed and cried together. I am so proud of the direction both of them are headed.

Lauren is graduating next week...I still haven't gotten used to the fact that she is old enough to drive and now she is packing up her bags and driving a cross the country for college (Gordon College). Allison is finnishing up the year in Mexico and then returning to Phoenix to finish her nursing degree. As I sat at the table with them last night and listened to them pour out their hearts, I was just slightly taken a back. They aren't my little sisters anymore needing my advice and protection...they are my partners in crime and this faith in action thing is so much easier when you have two kindred hearts to share it with.

2006-05-01T22:46:00.000-07:00

some of our boys....

2006-04-30T08:24:00.000-07:00

Meaghan's Blog...

2006-04-17T02:20:00.000-07:00

I just read something in Meaghan's last post that started the wheels turning in my head. She was commenting about her thoughts from the book she is reading and how the holy spirit is stirring a passion within her for justice, truth, and love. She was talking about starting a breakfast club in San Francisco and targeting unreached areas. You can read her post here: http://citilove.blogspot.com/2006/04/tuesday.html
I am not sure if I have posted about this scripture before (its possible because I love it so much), but as I read her post it immediately brought my mind to Matthew, chapter 9...the feeding of the five thousand... this might be one of my favorite chapters in the Gospel, because every time I read it I am so moved by the heart of Christ.

Starting in verse 10, Jesus finds out that John, his cousin, friend, the man who baptized him, had been beheaded. He was probably emotionally, physically, and spiritually exaughstead...in Luke the same account talks about how the disciples had just been running non-stop healing people and preaching the gospel. They were tired and they were mourning so Jesus goes to a deserted place to get away, to be alone with his heavenly Father...but the multitudes followed him.

His response in verse 14 is so selfless and makes me fall deeper in love with him every time I read it, "and when he saw a great multitude, he was moved with compassion."

I think that is a place where Christ wants all of us to come...where we can open our eyes, wherever we are, and see the great multitude. His flesh was weak and tired, but his spiritual eyes were still so in tune to the heart of His father and when he looked, he saw thousands and thousands of people who "were like a sheep without a shepherd"...lost. (mark 6:34)

Then...when Jesus sees they are hungry, tells the disciples, "Don't send them away...You give them something to eat..." It is so interesting to me that Jesus didn't just perform the miracle, but he gave the disciples the command first...he wanted them to be the vessels that met the need. He could have easily just performed a miracle and feed the multitude, but I think he wanted to give the disciples the opportunity to do it first. 2000 years later, Jesus is saying the same thing to us..."Don't send them away, you give them something to eat."

Meaghan is living in San Francisco...and she is right, there are probably more food ministries there then anywhere else in the country, but there is still a deep need that is not being met. Are we going to continue to plop some food on these hurting, broken peoples plates and send them away? Or are we going to really give them something to eat...something that once they taste, they will never hunger or thirst again? Justice comes in meeting the physical need out of a deep compassion for their soul...a compassion that produces and action to see those sheep find their shepherd.

lonely...feeling so lonely... :)

2006-04-15T08:35:00.000-07:00

Over the last two weeks we have been making trips to the airport to drop off our team...everyone is headed back to the states.

The last three months of working with my team has been such an incredible experience. I had no idea when I came here that I would have such an awesome group of friends to spend my first three months with...God blessed me so much. They have become like family and I am very thankful for the time I had here with them...I would go anywhere in the world with this team. God brought some amazing, life-long friends into my life who have encouraged me in so many ways.

I think my favorite part about our team was watching how God brought such different people together and knit our hearts so we could really work as one. We came to Tanzania on the same day from 7 different places... Arizona, San Fransisco, Detroit, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire, Wisconnsin, and Louisiana. Each one of the seven of us were so different in personality, culture, future plans, and backgrounds, but we all shared a common love for Jesus and had a desire to see God work in and through us.

About a month into being here, we each took leadership of a different area of ministry, but still worked as a team to do each thing. As I look back on everything I am in awe of all that God did...here are some highlights...

1. Becky-

Becky organized all of our hospital ministry. We went into the local hospital and visited and prayed with different paitents. Every time I went to the hospitals God did something in my heart...especially when we went to the children's ward.

I wish I could put into words what I saw with my eyes during one of those visits. I realized in an entirely new way how God's heart must break everytime he sees what has happened as a result of man's decision to break relationship with Him. God knows the physical pain that those children, literally dying in those beds, are feeling and he knows the emotional pain that the mothers are feeling as they cry out to Him for a miracle... God created this world to be so perfect, but it has been so corrupted by sin. And then God has offered his Son to reconcile and make all broken things whole, but we still chose to live a part from Him. Being in those rooms taught me so much about the heart of God and really opened up an entirely new attributes that I never realized or noticed about my God to fall in love with.

2. John-

John organized all of our village ministry/outreaches. We spent a few days camping out in a Masai village. That was such a great time. We also did a children's outreach in the Njoro area (I cannot wait to show you all some pictures from that, it was great.) and evangelism in two different villages on thursday nights.

3. Meaghan
Meaghan ran all the drama (and caused it all too...ha ha, just joking Meggie Mapes) I could say so much about Meaghan, she is so talented and gifted. I am sure that the boys at the Emmanuel Center will never forget the time we spent there. They loved the dramas that Meaghan came up with and they did such a great job performing them. Some of them were involved in a drama we did as an outreach and they were all a part of "Daniel and the Lion's Den." My absolute favorite thing I have done since I have been here has been hanging out at the Emmanuel center with those boys.

4. Heather-

Heather was in charge of worship and helped Meaghan with drama. We went to the Emmanuel Center every week and taught the boys songs and dramas. It was so much fun for us and the boys at the center absolutely loved it.

5. Christian
Christian organized the ministry we did in the elementary schools. We went to sevearl schools a week (I have some pictures in a previous post) and we did Bible lessons, dramas, object illustrations, and songs with the kids. It was so much fun and this was probably where our team spent the most time...between this and the high schools. (I organized the ministry we did with the high schools. We had so many awesome opportunities to speak to hundereds of high school students about all of our testimonies and what God has done in our lives).

6. Scott--

Scott organized an International English Fellowship. I did not realize before I came here how many college student age people would be here from all over the world. There were many Europeans here serving on their gap year, interning in the hospitals, and volunteering with different orginazations. There were also several Peace Corps volunteers. We met once a week for a bible study/fellowship time and I know that God definitely moved on hearts. If I were living here full time, this would definitely be something I would want to do. It is a huge opportunity to reach people from all over the world who have never really tasted authentic Christianity.

in Kenya...

2006-04-13T07:09:00.000-07:00

I am in Nirobe, Kenya right now. My visa expired in Tanzania...so that was a good excuse for a road-trip to Kenya so I can stay one more month in Tanzania. I am in a little bit of culture shock being here. In many ways, I feel like I am back in an American city. There are coffee shops (I had my first cup of coffe in 3 months two days ago...it was wonderful!), malls, book stores, lots of trafic, and almost everyone speaks English. Life here is very different from the life I have been living back in Moshi. I found myself yesterday just looking around the city and seeing all the business taking place and thinking, "this is such a wealthy city."

But that is far from the reality. One of the largest slums in the world is right in my backyard here in Nirobe...over one million people live in this slum. There are thousands of street children, orphans, and aids victums here...but, because of everything else I am looking at, it is easy to not think about it. Thinking about all of this made me realize how I can do this so easily in the spitirual realm. How often do I walk through life distracted by the initial impression of wealth and suceess, failing to see the pain and death right behind me? It is a choice humanity makes. We choose to ignore the pain and suffering and focus on what looks good and pretty.

Matthew 24 comes to mind, where Jesus tells his disciples to "Stay Awake"...because they wouldn't know the day or hour he was coming. I can almost hear the urgency in Jesus voice as he passionately compels the disciples not to waste time sleeping...there is a dying world out there that needs the truth.

Zanzibar

2006-04-01T06:46:00.000-08:00

I can scratch something off my "to-do" list...last week I had the amazing blessing of sticking my feet in the Indian ocean. We took a trip to Zanzibar, an island off the coast of Tanzania. In case any of you didn't know...I absolutely love my life. This year has just been filled with so many blessings from God.

Zanzibar was incredible. The water was so blue, the beaches were beautiful, and the time of fellowship with everyone was wonderful. But my first day in Zanzibar really just broke my heart once again for the Muslim world. The island is 97 percent Muslim, 1 percent Hindu, and 2 percent Christian. In Stonetown (the place we stayed the first day) there are 2500 buildings, 45 of them are Mosques and only 2 of those buildings are churches...one Anglican, and one Catholic church. There are 1 million people on this island...that means that 980,000 of them believe that Allah is the way to salvation and who knows what sort of understanding the rest of the people have about relationship with God.

It just makes me sad to see with my eyes how many people have no idea that they cannot earn their way to heaven. They live under such oppression and hatred, not understanding the freedom and love that comes in surrendering your life to Christ.

We spent our first day in Stonetown going through different places that were involved in the slave trades. I stood in a place where human beings were beaten, auctioned, sold, and torn from their families. I cannot even imagine the sounds that must have come from that square and the complete terror and pain that was experienced by so many.

The saddest thing to me, was that these "colonialist" were from Europe and America...both "Christian" places. I heard a story about a woman who remembered looking from the top of a hill down at her village, seeing it burn before her eyes in flames, and her mother saying to her, "look at that white man with the cross around his neck...whenever you see him, run, because he will take you away from us."

I know that those "colonialist" really were not followers of Christ. It just shows me once again how many people go through the religious motions of Christianity without ever understanding and knowing the heartbeat of Christ.

Men and women who had full access to the gospel at their hands came and went from that island, leaving devastation behind them...and now all this time has gone by, and Zanzibar is still a Godless place. I am praying for the Lord to really move on that island and just captivate the people's hearts with his light and truth.

Mt. Kilimanjaro

2006-03-06T11:56:00.000-08:00

I just spent the past week hiking to the top of Mt. Kili. It was one of the most amazing weeks of my life. Every day I had hours and hours to just look and wonder at God's incredible creation. I wish I could put into words how beautiful it was...

When I was in Phoenix, my pastor gave a message about sacrifice. One of the illustrations he gave was about climbing a mountain and he challenged everyone to, "live where it is hard to breath." He went on to explain how when you are at the top of that mountain, it can be so difficult to breath because of the altitude. Even though it can be so difficult to breath, that is the place that God wants to bring us, but it doesn't come without sacrifice. I had that analogy in mind the entire way up the mountain and the Lord really spoke to me throughout the week about climbing spiritual mountains.

I realized as I was hiking up that there have been many times in life when we use the word "valley" to describe where we are spiritually, when in reality...just because we are struggling, does not always mean we are in a valley at all. The last day that we went to the peak, each and every step became so difficult. It took us about 7 hours to go less then 3 miles, but because we were so high and had so little oxygen, we had to hike so slow. I realized while I was hiking that I always say I want to run this race that God has called me to with all that I have and in my head, running that race means constantly going at sprinting speed. For me, anything less then a sprint has always meant failure. But I realized yesterday that there will be many times in my life that I cannot run with a sprint...There will be times where I feel like I am going so slow, barely moving, unable to see any progress with my minds eye, but that very well may be because God is calling me to a new peak, a new place where he can reveal himself in an entirely new way and expose me to an entirely new place to share His love. There will be times where God will ask us to sacrifice our plans and dreams and just follow him up to the top and trust Him completely that He knows where and why He is leading us there.

There were times throughout the week that the peak...our destination was covered by storm clouds. I know that there are seasons of life where every step is so difficult, every step makes us loose our breath, and we look up to see the final destination, but it is just too cloudy to see...and some times, it is too cloudy to see even ten steps in front of you. But because God has revealed that peak to us long before the clouds ever came, we have to continue to step forward in faith. The storm clouds will eventually clear, maybe only momentarily, but they will clear long enough for you to see that peak again and know in your heart where He is bringing you.

The last few days of hiking, because of the elevation, we had no appetite or desire to drink water. In those same seasons that are so difficult and painful, sometimes we loose all appetite for spiritual things. It can become difficult to seek God, to pray, and to hear His voice...but in order to make it to that point, we could not wait until our bodies began to crave food and water, it would have been too late...we just had to drink and eat. The same thing goes for us spiritually. I know that in some of those places you may feel so distant and so far from where you once were in your relationship with God, but don't give up...continue to seek him, you are on your way to an incredible place.

At some point on the hike to the summit, the guide turned around and saw that I was falling behind. He just told me to stay with him, to just follow closely behind him and follow his steps completely. When I forced myself to focus on the steps the guide was taking and not on how exaughted I was--it imeadiately became so much easier. As I listened to him tell me that I just thought of 1 Peter 2:21, "to this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, that you should follow in His steps."

Okay...one more analogy. :) In the last few hours of hiking, it was practically impossible to speak. You literally had to plan out each and every word you were going to say. My friend that hiked it with me kept making a point to encourage me...little phrases every few minutes to let me know that I was doing good and that he was confident that I could make it. He made his hike so much more difficult and risked possibly not even making it just to encourage me and make my steps a little bit easier. That is so how the community of Christ should be and the type of friend I want to be. We were not meant to make that climb alone, God has placed people in our life to encourage and help us along the way. And there are people all around us that we need to be willing to risk everything and sacrifice our own comforts in order to help them make that next step.

I just wanted to share that with everyone. I know it doesn't really flow so well together, but thanks for taking the time to read it. I will post pictures soon!

some safari pictures

2006-02-27T19:54:00.000-08:00

here are some pictures from our Safari. Unfortunately, I haven't had time yet to download my favorite pictures to the computer yet. But these are some good ones too... here is the lodge we stayed at...our rooms over looked the crator, it was breathtaking.

I love this picture...this camera isn't on zoom (i don't think it is anyway)...we were SO close we could have reached out and pet the lions. :)

2006-02-18T03:23:00.000-08:00

2006-02-16T03:28:00.000-08:00

Our team has been going into elementary schools and teaching bible lessons. The public schools here are very open to us coming and speaking to their students.
Louis with the kids...
"David" kills Goliath... :)

My Valentine's Day dates (its funny...V-day was a much bigger holiday here then in the States, so for all you cynics who thought Halmark invented it, it seems to be a world-wide day of love!))

here are some pictures... :)

2006-01-30T20:54:00.000-08:00

Gaudenzia and Emmanuel...
Kelvin and Emmanuel E...
Noella and Enoch...
This is my team for most of the time that I am here. It has been such a blessing to have them here...we are having a great time together. :)

here is a picture from my backyard... :) The picture doesn't do it justice.

2006-01-20T16:05:00.000-08:00

so...everyone is asking me to post pictures, and I would LOVE to...but I am having technical difficulties! :) But be patient with me! I will figure it out soon.

Its hard to believe I have already been here for two weeks. The time is going by SO fast...yet, in many ways I feel like I have been here for years!

I have already had so many new experiences. I literally could write for pages about what has happened thus far. Each day is filled with so many exciting adventures and life-changing experiences. It is completely by God's grace that I am here and I am overwhelmed by the fact that the Lord brought me from Phoenix to Tanzania and is allowing me to see everything I have seen.

I am really enjoying being at the Emmanuel Center. Those boys are amazing. They all have stories that would break your heart, yet they are filled with so much joy and they really love each other. I have spent several days there playing soccer and trying to teach some English...but mostly they were laughing at my poor attempt to pronounce the Swahili words correctly. :)

We have also been working at Moyo Moja, a center for widowed or single mothers. I will write more about it later, the center just opened a week ago...so most of the work is just in getting it up and running, but once it is--I know it is going to be used to touch and change so many lives.

The world is so big. I know that isn't a very enlightening statement, but as I make new friends and meet new people every day from so many different cultures, countries, and backgrounds, I am just realizing more and more how small I am and how big the world is. It amazes me to think that God cares with such intense passion about each and every one of us and longs and desires for personal, intimate, authentic relationship with each and every soul. I have known that in my head for a long time, but somehow being here, seeing how the Lord is pursuing His children all over the world in such powerful ways has given me an entirely new love and hunger for God.

Like I said, I could write for pages about what is going on, what I am learning, and how much fun I am having! Thank you all for your encouragement and prayers. :)

2006-01-11T22:29:00.000-08:00

I am finally here! :)

Here is a picture of Jill (the missionary I will be working with) and her two children that she is in the process of adopting, Noella Sessy and Enoch Manji

here are four of the boys from the Emmanuel Center.

my favorite 7 year old...

2006-01-09T15:11:00.000-08:00

I have had such a great time in Rhode Island. I am SO blessed to have an amazing extended family. Today is my last day of this snowy, cold weather...I leave tomorrow for Tanzania! I appreciate everyones encouragement, support, and prayers. We were able to fill up two of those blue containers with lots of fun things for the kids and the missionaries over there!

My aunt and uncle and their two children went to Tanzania this time last year. Cole, was extremely jealous that I was going to the Emmanuel Center without him. Hardly a day goes by that Cole does not talk about going to Africa or those kids... he even tried to sneak into my luggage. :) We were joking with him for about a week before we realized that he thought we were serious. His little heart was so sad when Chris had to explain to him that he could not ride in my luggage. I am convinced if we were to discover Martians on Mars tomorrow...Cole would be on the next space ship ride to be the first missionary there. :) I love his special heart.

2005-10-08T23:56:00.000-07:00

Just “skimming” through the news tonight…some pretty heavy headlines.

Quake Kills More Than 3,000 in South Asia

Mudslides, Floods in Guatemala Kill 500

Is it ever hard for any of you to stay focused? It is for me. It does not take much to convince me that there are so many broken people in need of God’s healing touch. Everywhere I look, I see physical, spiritual, and emotional need. I just want to be in the place that God can use me the most to impact his kingdom the most. It is easy for me to get overwhelmed sometimes, to look at all the hurt and pain and know that many will never know the power in God’s touch.

So as I was praying today about what is going on all over the world…from the people closest to me…to those in our country who have lost everything from Katrina, to Guatemala, to South Asia…I began to get discouraged as to how God can use me to reach those individuals who are experiencing incredible devastation right now.

Then I read this amazing passage of scripture…

1 Peter 4:8-11

But the end of all things is at hand; therefore be serious and watchful in your prayers. And above all things have fervent love for one another, for "love will cover a multitude of sins." Be hospitable to one another without grumbling. As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

That passage blew me away. So what can I do? What can we do?

Be serious and watchful in our prayers.
Above all things—have a fervent love for one another.
Use the gifts God gave us…minister them to one another…
Speak on behalf of God, minister under the ability which God supplies
SO THAT in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ.
What an intense “crash” the church would become if we did that?

2005-09-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to share some precious stories about my cousin, Nicholas.

Last week, Allison, Nicholas, and I were walking down the street in downtown phoenix and a man who seemed to be homeless walked up to us. He asked us for some money to ride the bus. Without hesitating, my eight-year-old cousin reached into his pocket, whipped out his wallet, looked at the man with a big smile and said, “I have money.”

The man looked at him and said, “no, no, kid…I can’t take your money.” And Nicholas quickly responded, “no, its okay…I get $2 a week in allowance”. As we walked away, Nick looked at us and said, “the sad thing is, he will probably spend it on beer…but he still needs it more then me.” I was so touched at his pure heart and his desire to give, without hesitation. It wasn't just that he was too innocent to assume that themoney would not be used on food...he was so innocent that it didn't matter to him what it was spent on, he just knew he had plenty and this man had little.

Then…this past weekend, Nick and I were hanging out and somehow the topic of kids came up…he looked at me with a total sincere heart…there was no doubt in his mind that he would one day do this, but he said, “Dennae, I am going to adopt five kids. One from China, one from India, one from Africa, one from Russia, and one from Mexico that way I have one child from all parts of the world. Then when we go on missions trips, my kids can translate for us depending on the country we are in.” He had this huge smile on his face and was so excited as he thought about it.

His heart is so special. I totally love that kid. The heart that all of my younger cousins have totally blows me away…you always hear about 2nd and 3rd generation Christians who are totally burned by church and turned off to God, but the Lord has gotten a hold of these precious hearts at a young age and I feel like God is constantly speaking to me through their precious thoughts, motives, and big dreams. I long to have that precious child like love, heart, and passion.

“At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, "Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, and said, "Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me. "But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”
Matthew 18:1-6

just some thoughts...

2005-09-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

“The world is perishing for lack of the knowledge of God and the Church is famishing for want of His presence. The instant cure of most of our religious ills would be to enter the Presence in spiritual experience, to become suddenly aware that we are in God and God is in us. This would lift us out of our pitiful narrowness and cause our hearts to be enlarged. This would burn away the impurities from our lives as the bugs and fungi were burned away by the fire that dwelt in the bush.”

-A.W. Tozer

I read that in “The Pursuit of God” a few weeks ago and the words keep coming up in conversation and discussion about the church. It seems like Christians all around me are famished for God’s presence and I think A.W. Tozer’s observations hit the nail on the head. What if we entered into spiritual experience? What if w truly understood that we are in God and God is in us. How would that change the way we live our daily lives? How would it change the way we view and serve this world?

It seems like the topic of conversation the past few weeks in my circle has been, “works”. “Works can’t save you” and “you can’t earn your salvation” are concepts the church wants to make sure their congregation really understands. Here is an analogy I have kind of been imaging up in my head as I have been listening to people…imagine your relationship with your spouse. What if you took out the trash, tucked your kids into bed at night, did the dishes, sat and listened to your wife share their feelings/ frustrations, and even kissed them goodbye in the morning because it made you a “good husband/wife”. What if your only purpose in doing all those things were to live up to the standard of what a “good spouse” was, but you had no desire to do it out of your love for the person? You would quickly become burned out and feel a lack of love in your life. That is the equivalent to “doing” just for the sake of “doing” what God requires of you. But what if you did the same things in your relationship with your spouse, not because you had to, but because you deeply loved the person and wanted to pour out as much of your love into their life as possible? The actions might look the same, but the heart would be different. One person is burned out by the action and the other is energized by the action.
I think that is one of the differences between the average Christian wandering through life famishing for God’s presence and one walking through knowing they are in God and God is in them. I really believe a lot of entering into God’s presence and an intimate relationship with Christ has to do with our understanding of what that means…to be aware that God in us means we share his heart…and God’s heart beats for people. He has an intense love for them I believe he wants to pour into our hearts…if the world is perishing for a lack of knowledge of God then I need to do a better job of knowing God so I can share Him with them.

2005-09-02T11:32:00.000-07:00

I wish I could do something greater then donate money to help with this disaster...lives are in shambles right now...I just pray that God moves on our hearts and there are people who can go help minster to hearts and lives. Here are some great ways to help a little...

World Vision
Red Cross

I want to continue the train of thought from my last post. You know, my heart and mind seems to be maxed out as far as understanding as much as I possibly can the great need in this world. There are so many physical needs not being met...and while I am so passionate about being an active participant in doing something, anything to at least help a few...I want to make sure that it is ALL being driven out of my desire to meet their spiritual needs.
When I look at pictures, hear stories, and think about lives that are destroyed through this disaster...and lives all over the world that are hopelessly struggling just to survive, something inside of me wants to change that. But it is almost easy to get passionate about that and get on a soap box about being wasteful physically and being so selfishly materialistic and ignore the even GREATER tragedy...being wasteful spiritually. I want to be able to look into the hearts of all those around me and have the same compassion on them that I have for children in Africa or Asia. They are starving spiritually. In some ways it is a little more difficult...because it is harder to see the need...but I pray that my eyes are constantly open and my heart always sensitive to know the need spiritually.

Finding the Balance...

2005-08-29T09:34:00.000-07:00

In my last post, I wrote, "I am not so sure what I am going to do with it yet...I just know that the Lord is moving me, more every day, into a place where I am sickened by how much I spend on self and comfort." Well, it has been a week now since I saw Pastor Modekai's face and my thoughts and conversations have been consumed with what I am going to do.

The concept of giving and blessings just seem so backward to me (at least the way I have always heard it taught in church and Christian circles)...

Why do we always say, "give and the Lord will bless you?" or, "if you give abundantly you will receive abundantly?" This is the question that keeps running through my head, "how much more do we want God to bless us financially?" I mean, the American living off of minimum wage is rich compared to the third world...they are struggling, but they are still blessed.

Give more to be blessed more? I don't think Christ intended for my giving to be about me. What about give more because God can use it to reach the hearts and souls of people? Or give more because kids in Honduras are dying from a bug bite that would be prevented if they had a tin roof on their houses? Or because a $7 bottle of medicine would cure millions from a disease that causes blindness? What about give more because millions are dying from AIDS, malaria, drought, and famine?

I keep asking myself, "Why have I conformed to the mindset that I should be striving for more things?" Why do we work our entire lives to live "more comfortably?" What is wrong with living comfortably...why do we need more? (I know the answer to that is sin, pride, but it seems like materialism has become an idol that is turning our hearts to everything but God)

The rich ruler came to Jesus and asked, "What else can I do?" Sell it all, give to the poor, and follow me. Who do you think the rich ruler is?

I am. Working at starbucks part time...in America, that is nothing, but to the world, I am wealthy beyond belief. So what else can I do, beyond what I am already doing, to follow Christ?

Sell it. Give it. Follow.

I have often justified my pull to materialism by saying it is okay to enjoy the excess, because God has blessed me to enjoy it...and while there may be some truth to that, there is a line that is crossed where we begin to glorify ourselves rather then God through possessions.

I know that this might seem like I am being extreme. I am not saying we should live below poverty. I am typing this just after I finished drinking my $2.oo starbucks cup of coffee, but I can't stop asking myself these questions because of what I might need to give up. There has to be a balance. What is it? Maybe the church is living way above her means...or right in line with her means, when she could be living way below her means. Please understand that I am not pointing fingers or being judgemental...I am simply asking, "what is the balance?" and "are we living it?"

I know the answer for me is that I am out of balance. I fear to think about how out of balance because I don't want to give up my toys. What if God is calling some of us to radically change our spending habbits and what we spend our money on? What if he is calling some of us to give up something as small as our dish network/ tivo or something as large as downsizing our house? Am I really willing to think, pray, and challenge myself as to what God wants me to do? How radically can I and will I live?

Just the thoughts going through my head...please share what your thoughts are...

their food, our toys...

2005-08-25T23:53:00.000-07:00

Pastor Mordekai has been staying at our house this past week. He has been going through the phone book, calling pastors, asking them if he can come meet with them and share his story. We were at a church this past week in Fountain Hills that was serving and reaching out into their community in great ways...the pastor had such a tender heart. They were giving us a tour of their preschool when we came across a room with rice all over the floor.

Pastor Mordekai looked at the room with a very confused look on his face. His eyes wandered to a table...filled with rice and toys. "Is this a toy?" he asked the pastor, stunned. The pastor replied with an I-know-what-you-are-thinking, "yes". Pastor Mordekai lost it...his eyes filled up with tears and a look of pain came acros his face. He just groaned and paused, then said..."You Americans..." he continued to stare at the table filled with rice. "In the villages in my country...this is their food. Their only food. The children, the families, only have enough to eat twice, maybe three time a week. And your children are playing with it...throwing it all over the floor. Ughh...you Americans."

He wasn't disgusted, he wasn't angry...but I think his heart hurt...as did mine...as did the pastors. I haven't been able to get the facial expression he made out of my head or heart all week... I am not so sure what I am going to do with it yet...I just know that the Lord is moving me, more every day, into a place where I am sickened by how much I spend on self and comfort.

On those lines...if you haven't read Dale's post and article about the 600 million children living in poverty...please take the time to read it.

Back in Arizona...

2005-08-19T11:19:00.000-07:00

I am back in sunny Arizona...I think I missed most of the heat...it is still warm, but cool enough to enjoy being outdoors! As much as I miss the cool weather and amazing people back east, it is nice to be home too (and out of the car!).

Brooke and I had a crazy week driving across country...it was so much fun. New York City and Chicago are both awesome places, but the atmosphere of the two were both so different. It was so much fun to see the difference between the two cities. Not just the physical difference, but the difference in personalities, paces, and style. Chicago as a whole was so much more laid back then New York...but both places were fun and we met some great people during our travels (In case ya'll didn't already know this...Brooke is a people magnent).

I think the biggest shocker for the week was Kansas City. I never imagined there being such a big inner city in Missouri. I saw more homeless people in the one day I was in Kansas City then in the three days I was in New York and Chicago combined. But it was so encouraging...I was able to meet the pastors of Brook's church, Solomon's Porch, and it was incredible to me how much they are giving to the community. They are feeding the homeless, providing clothes, food, shelter, day care for single moms, a youth center for the kids and teens to hang out in after school and on weekends...but most of all they are pouring out an incredible amount of God's unconditional love. I could have sat and listened to those pastors talk forever about their passion for reaching Kansas City. I love seeing how God is moving the entire body of Christ to meet the needs of this world. Dale, I love what you said in your comment on my last post, "I do think there is something in the kingdom of God that causes the spread of His people. I don't think it an accident that the apostles didn't die in a group but alone and on mission." I love when...on my journey...I am able to cross paths for even a short while and meet people who are, "on mission"...just reminds, encourages, and empowers me to stay on mine.

See you on the field...

2005-08-11T04:24:00.000-07:00

You know the sports movies where the team is in this high-tention game...they take a quick time out...regroup, restrategize, then come back and give it their all and win the game? That is kind of what I felt this summer was like. I was extermely blessed to meet some amazing people who live their life like they are in the last 30-seconds of the game. When I talk with my new friends and my wonderful family, it is not like talking to a bunch of people sitting on the side-lines, critiquing the performance of the players...they are the players, and they are passionately pouring their hearts, bodies, and souls into this world. My friends and family here are not philosophers. They don't sit around and ponder how life could be better. They are strategizers. They gather together, swap war stories, and plan the next move. Every time you see them...they have taken new ground.

So, I am leaving in a few hours to drive back across the country... I didn't know it was possible to fall in love with so many people so quickly. I look forward to hearing all about the amazing things that happens in and through each and every one of you. Each of you encouraged me to live a more missional life in a unique and wonderful way. Thank you.

2005-08-07T06:32:00.000-07:00

The most exciting thing that happened this week had to be the time I was able to spend with my grandfather...

Victor, my grandfather, has been one of the closest and dearest people to my heart for my entire life. Although he is not a Christian, he has been one of the most influential people in my life spiritually. e is not a hard person about anything in life, except God (of course he picks the most important decision of his life the thing worth being stubborn on). But even though he does not believe in God, God has used him in my life greatly to give me a burden for those who do not have a relationship with Him. I could write pages about what my grandfather has taught me spiritually without ever trying, but that will have to be a different post.

My grandpa lives very close to me in Arizona and for as long as I have been alive I have been praying for him and sharing with him every chance I get about what life is like with a relationship with Jesus. He is always so hard when I bring it up...he will go off about how when he moved to Rhode Island from Honduras the church in town that had the only private school refused to let his daughters in because the were Hispanic. Or he will tell stories about how his father abandoned him and his twin brother was shot while they were hunting together as teenagers—and how could there be a God who would allow pain? We have had hundreds, maybe thousands of conversations of him just pouring out his heart, his hard heart about why God cannot and does not exist. I have often driven home feeling so hopeless and not being able to see any possible way that he would surrender his life to the Lord...I knew it would take a miracle.

Well...I started praying for a miracle when I was at a kids camp in 3rd grade...so about 13 years ago and the week in Honduras was the first glimpse of an answered prayer. When we got to my grandfather’s nephew’s house in San Pedro Sula we all sat around a table and everyone immediately began to share stories. Come to find out, both of my grandfather’s nephews are Christians and my grandfather’s father became a Christian in the later years of his life. Christ changed his life and he stopped drinking and actually raised my grandpa’s nephew’s when their father abandoned them. At the beginning of the week, my grandpa just shrugged it off and made comments like, “na...he was a drunk” but by the end of the week he was telling us story after story through teary eyes about how many good memories he had of his father.

I was sitting at one of my grandpa’s nephew’s houses and they began to share a poem with my grandpa that his father had written shortly before he died. Victor was translating it from Spanish into English for me and he was so choked up he couldn’t finish it. I am going to post the poem in a week or so once I have it completely translated, but a few lines from the poem that I remember were—

Who is this God? This amazing being?
Who can make an egg into a bird
A worm into a butterfly
A lost and soul into a beautiful child?

On the plane ride home I realized that I have developed a poor misconception of God’s love over the years...

I always heard it said and believed it whole heartedly that if we continue to harden our hearts that God will at some point stop drawing us to Him. I have heard it used in altar calls and evangelistic services and while I am sure there is some truth to that, I think it has been taken out of context. God is love. Love is patient. Love is kind. Love always hopes. Love always perseveres. Love endures all things. Love always protects. God’s love is never ending and unfailing. In the past I have often prayed, “Father, I know he has hardened his heart so many times....but please still draw him to you.” As I watched God so intentionally pursue my Grandfather’s heart during that week, I realized that there is nothing that can separate us from God’s love. Eight years old or eighty years old, saint or murderer, God’s love will continue to pursue our hearts and call out to us until the day we die.

2005-07-29T21:23:00.000-07:00

I am in Honduras right now. It is so beautiful here. Definitely a unique beauty...not like anything I have ever experienced before. I hope to be posting several stories over the next few days about this past week.

I had no idea what to expect when I got on the plane to come here. I was definitely excited to come to Central America, but I thought it was going to be kind of a ¨puposeless¨week...most people go to third world countries to serve and do missions, and I was coming to spend a week on a beautiful beach. I thought the extent of my opportunity would be to spend time with my grandfather and share with him more about my faith. I could not have been more wrong.

I have more family living in Honduras then I have living in the United States, but I never knew it. I knew I had some second cousins, great uncles, and so forth...but from the moment I have arrived here I have been surrounded by people who treat me like I am their long lost daughter. It has been such a powerful experience for me to get to know all of my family, to walk into a room and see people who look so much like me, and to hear story after story about what my grandfather and grandmother were like growing up. I feel very...at home.

I don´t have time to tell many stories right now...but I will post some soon.

2005-07-21T22:55:00.000-07:00

I read this in a book called “Experiential Storytelling” by Mark Miller:

“What if we were to take our message and begin speaking the language of the natives? Instead of telling people Jesus is the light of the world, what if we showed them the stark difference between light and darkness?
What if we removed all the argumentative language, replaced it with beautiful narratives, and let people feel the power of the story? Instead of trying to convince people to accept a list of spiritual laws, how about placing individuals in the story, allowing them to learn and interact with God’s character? What if we told our story in a holistic manner engaging all of the God-given senses? What if...?”

I had to re-read that paragraph a few times. It was very powerful to me. Telling people about Jesus is so powerful and such an important part of pushing God’s kingdom forward. But when you match up telling people, with showing people, I think the impact you make is so much greater.

But as I read that paragraph over again, I could not help but ask how many Christians are able to show the world “the stark difference between light and dark?” Do we even know how stark of a difference it really is? How are we really able to speak in beautiful narratives...in a way that people can feel the power of the story?

I know this is really basic, but it all comes down to knowing and understanding the word of God. We can try as hard as we can to learn the “lingo” of our time and read book after book about all the different cultures in our midst, but if we do not have a love for God’s word, how can we possible tell the Story to those we encounter as if it were real?

I love to read, it does not really matter the genre, but something different happens to me when I read God’s word. I cannot even compare my experience to reading any normal book to my experience of reading the scriptures. The bible is so alive to me. It is almost like a living, breathing organism. As I read different passages of scripture I feel drawn into the stories, into the lives of the men who were used to write the passages. As I read the Gospels, I imagine myself following Jesus around and sitting at his feet, hearing his teaching. I play out the battle scenes and stories in my head like I was watching them in a movie theater. As I read God’s word my heart is captivated and my soul feels so charged, at home, at rest.

We need to speak the language of the natives. Do you know what they want? They want to hear something authentic. Something real. Its time for us to engage the Story with all of our God-given senses. Its time for to fall passionately in-love with God so we can stop talking about God and start talking like we know Him.

So...question for those who want to share. Do you remember a time when reading God’s word shifted from a “to-do” to something that you were passionate about?

2005-07-14T12:11:00.000-07:00

The comments from the last post really stirred my heart and mind. I would like to comment on several things said...

Starting with David’s comments. I love that scripture in James, “Pure and Undefiled Religion is this...” I believe with my whole heart that we are called to go and do everything within our means to impact this world for eternity. We cannot leave the job to someone else—God has entrusted it to each of us who desire to follow Him.

It isn’t about “doing” just for the sake of “doing.” It is about living a life devoted to something much greater and more important then “self.” The comment was made that people get busy with church. I love what Dennis (my dad) said in his comment: “Let's not be busy for the sake of business. Let's rather make sure our lives have significance because we are pouring them into the lives of others and reaching the lost with the awesome good news.” Isn’t that what it all comes down to? Are we going to live a life gratifying and fulfilling the desires of “self” or are we going to spend our lives spreading the Gospel?

Here is what it all boils down to for me:

“For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps.” 1 Peter 2:21

So is it this “must do” approach just part of the “rich and powerful” American mindset? I don’t believe it is. I think that mindset is evident in Christ as He walked His final days on earth. I do not believe that God would have provided a Savior for our souls if in His heart He did not have the “must do” mindset. He loved us so much, that no matter the cost...He was going to give each of us an opportunity to spend eternity with Him. As each of us makes a decision to follow in Christ’s steps we must also choose the same. The more we fall in-love with our Lord, the more we will fall in love for His children. As we “have the mind of Christ Jesus” take shape within our own minds...we will begin to have a deeper and clearer understanding that there is no other option then to offer the Truth to this world, no matter the cost is to self.

I also understand what Madcupmum was saying about the Gate. I think you were saying that Christ is the one who will guide us, like a shepherd gently guides his sheep, through the gate. If the “break down the door” analogy seems too harsh, then the other analogy works just as well. (Just to clarify things...that analogy was never meant to mean we should go Westernize the world...that is the last thing we should do. It just means that whatever barriers exist that we are capable of removing by us being pliable and flexible...then lets move them).

What do you think it is about the shepherd that causes the sheep to trust him? I read once that a shepherd touches each and every sheep as he enters his gate each night and speaks to the sheep. That is why the sheep recognize and now the voice of their master. It is his loving hand, his loving touch. How much more can we follow in Christ’s steps then by offering our loving hand to this world so that through us they might feel the loving and healing touch of their Father?

My “missions trip” doesn’t start when I get off that plane in Tanzania no more then it ends when Allison and Lauren come back from Mexico. My life is a mission...this is a race and I have to decide each and every morning if I am going to run it with all of my heart, soul, and mind. My “mission” is to reveal the heart of my Father to every person who God allows to cross my path...

Why Not...Part 2

2005-07-10T14:29:00.000-07:00

I would like to continue the discussion from the previous post.... I would like to focus some things that Dale and Brent said.

Dale said, “When it comes to callings...and doors of opportunities....and all that stuff that we construct to create some valid reason why we don't obey God...well, I just don't believe in those things anymore.”

Pastor Dale told me something along the same lines when I first got to Rhode Island and it has challenged me in every area of my life. He told me that so often we wait for an “open door” but scripture doesn’t really talk about open doors. If the door is not open, then try a window, and if we can’t find a window...then run as hard as we can through the wall and try to break through the wall. If can’t break the wall and we die from the impact of hitting it, then at least the wall is a little weaker and will be a little easier for the next person to break through.

When I first visualized that I thought...wow, how many opportunities have I missed because I had no door to walk through? I mean, I do not even know when I developed the attitude that I needed God to “open doors” but I remember praying from a young age that God would show me His will by opening and closing doors. Imagine what would have happened in the early church if they waited for open doors? They gave their lives to spread the gospel because there were no open doors...they broke through the walls.

Dale also said, “I propose that we all take our lives and hit this world as hard as we can. Yep, it will cost us our lives.” Spending our lives is something that goes completely against the grain of American culture. Our culture is constantly trying to make our lives more comfortable and easier to live. The “American Dream” is defined by many as the ability to acquire wealth. Even within the church, we counsel our kids to pick careers that will help them achieve “success” and often they chose paychecks over passion. If we, as believers and followers of Christ, are not spending our lives to impact this world...then what are we saving it for? Why are we building ourselves into a box with satin cushions...why are we obsessed with comfort? That comfortable, cushioned box I lived in was nothing more then a coffin. A friend of mine recently told me that he wants to “live his life without borders.” That is what I want to do...live my life without borders. I want to take my life and hit this world as hard as I can. Is my life more valuable then others? Is my comfort more important then sharing love and life with others who are in desperate need?
Brent made the comment, (refering to the great commission) “...so why don't we at every opportunity given to us?” I loved that. You know, this opportunity to Africa is not a once and a lifetime opportunity. The opportunity to go into any part of this world is always there (you can always go by yourself or create your own trip), but at what point in our lives are we going to just do it? I want to take every opportunity to share the message of Christ with people. I want to take every opportunity to love those who have never really experienced love. The trip I am taking to Tanzania is something that I know God can and will use me in...I will be able to love on these kids who have grown up on the streets and share Christ with Muslims and people who do not know God—I also know he will awaken my eyes, hands, heart, and soul to what real need is and what I really need to do to impact this world. I want to take, like Brent said, “every opportunity given” to me to change this world.

2005-07-06T13:51:00.000-07:00

Why Not?

2005-07-06T13:27:00.000-07:00

Why Not???

Okay...so here is my challenge to all my friends, co-workers, acquaintances, and family who are currently in college (or just graduated and haven’t made any long-term commitments yet). Take the spring semester off of school and come to Tanzania with me.

I laugh as I say that, because I say it like it is no big deal...but seriously, is it? I mean...sometimes we get so tied down to thinking that we have to get started on our careers or we have to finish school as fast as possible, but for what? Especially those who want to go into “full-time ministry”...what is the rush to get a job at a church? I mean...this would be "full time ministry" What is the rush to get your credentials? Or those of us who want to be lawyers, business men and women, polititians...will it really matter 20 years from now if you started your “career” 6 months latter then you were supposed to?

Can you imagine if ten of us decide to devote three months to non-stop, around the clock, outreach and “missions.” What a great opportunity to touch lives of children across the world or to build relationships/ friendships with Muslims and share the Truth with them. What an incredible chance to tell people who may have never heard the name “Jesus” all about who he is and what he can do for them. What an unbelievable opportunity to hold a child who has lived most of their life sniffing glue on a street to keep their stomach from feeling hungry. America is not this world...the horrors that we expect children to be sheltered from are norms in other countries, what are we going to do about it?

Not only that...but our world-view is so warped... I was thinking this morning how often I use the word “need” and I felt a little nauseous. “Need”...I do not even really know the meaning of that word, I have never had an unmet physical “need” in my life. The only way that our generation has a chance at changing this world is if we can shift our focus from “me” to “them” and from “selfishness” to “selflessness.” There is this Keith Green song that I love that says, “it is so hard to see when my eyes are on me...” how true is that? What are we going to do to get our eyes off of ourselves and onto others? Think about how an experience like this would change our hearts and our eyes/view forever.

Okay...so we are not all going to end up living in third world countries for the rest of our lives. But why not for a small period of time? What is three months in light of eternity? It is just three months. Will you miss your friends and family? Of course. Will it be difficult and lonley at times...probably. But if not now, then when? If you don’t make the time to do something like this...it isn’t going to just happen.

So it cost a lot of $...but there are so many things we could live without for the next 6 months to save for it. So our family thinks its crazy and irresponsible to take time off of school...I think God would be totally cool with it. So we haven’t “audibly” heard from God that we should do this...umm, wait...I think there is something at the end of Matthew 28? We want to wait and see if the door is opening up for us (creek...hear that sound? That is the sound of the door opening up for you =))

Okay...enough rambling. I am only challenging you to this because I think something like this could change us in a way that would bring about change to this world. I think we all need a bigger dose of passion and compassion...and what better way to get it then from putting ourselves in a situation where we can see first hand how great the need is in this world and how we can be used by God to touch it. So pray about it...think about it...email me about it and I will pray with and for you...and if it isn’t Tanzania in January, then pray and plan on serving somewhere soon (before life gets too committed and too crazy) somewhere outside of the good ol’ USA. I think each of us really should spend some amount of time outside of what we have always known to be true here in America...it would do the world (and America) SO much good to see what most of this world is living with day in and day out. If anything, it will give you experiences that you can use right here in Arizona, Rhode Island, and everywhere in between to reach people.

Email me if you want the information. Here are some web sites to check out too:
www.pureopportunity.blogspot.com
www.emmanuelcenter.blogspot.com